Sex, Love & Everything In Between

Ep 90: Q+A: Kink, keeping the passion alive & communicating desires

• Meg and Jacob O'Neill • Season 2 • Episode 90

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We’re back with another juicy episode of Sex, Love & Everything in Between!

In this episode, Meg and Jacob dive deep into a raw, vulnerable conversation about opening up new desires in the bedroom. Whether it's craving some playful kink or yearning for more sensual connection, this episode gets into the nitty-gritty of how to invite your partner into your fantasies in a way that feels aligned and safe for both of you. Let’s talk about being bold, breaking through the "routine," and tapping into what really turns you on—without guilt or judgment.

Meg vulnerably shares her experience navigating her pregnancy with trust and surrender, while Jacob reflects on how personal rituals can deepen the bonds we share. They show us that intimacy goes way beyond the physical—it's about inviting your partner into your inner world.

They riff off on:

  • How to express new desires and fantasies without making your partner feel like they’re doing something “wrong”
  • Building a foundation of trust and communication that lets you be both wild and vulnerable
  • Leading with curiosity and openness—because that’s where the magic lives!
  • Using everyday moments to create deeper intimacy, even when life is busy
  • The importance of taking ownership of your pleasure and inviting your partner to join you there

and many more...

If you're ready to hear the real, unfiltered truth about birth, surrender, and embracing every aspect of this intense rite of passage, this episode is for you.

⚡ Loved this episode? Make sure to subscribe and leave us a review! We love hearing your thoughts and experiences.

⚡ Let’s stay connected:
- Follow Meg: @the.meg.o
- Follow Jacob: @thejacoboneill

⚡ Grab our relationship freebie: https://meg-oneill.com/relationship-freebie
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⚡ Join TGOM - https://www.theembodiedmaninstitute.com/tgom-2024


Jacob & Meg also coach individuals & couples. Reach out to them via Instagram for more information. 

Meg O'Neill:

I'm feeling this kinky part of me come alive, and I really want to know what it would feel like to like, have your hand around my throat, or for you to spank me when we're having sex. Or, yeah, these things, these new desires, are coming alive for me. Like, what? How would you feel about that? Or would you be open to exploring that together? So it's like leading with a desire and expressing what's alive for you and then inviting your partner into it like, basically, this is what I desire. What are your thoughts on that? Or are you open to that?

Jacob O'Neill:

Yo, yo, yo. Lovers. Welcome, welcome. To sex, love and everything in between. We're the O'Neills. You're here with Meg and Jacob, and

Meg O'Neill:

this is the place we have really uncensored conversations about sex, intimacy and relationships. We're super excited you're here. Enjoy this episode.

Jacob O'Neill:

Hey, lovers,

Meg O'Neill:

welcome back, everybody. Welcome,

Jacob O'Neill:

welcome. How are you, my love. I'm

Meg O'Neill:

great, yeah, yeah,

Jacob O'Neill:

feeling good.

Meg O'Neill:

How are you?

Jacob O'Neill:

Yeah, I'm feeling a bit. How am I feeling? I think I'm like, feeling we've had so much on that I'm like, I can feel the part of me that's like, rushing towards the weekend? Yeah, today's Friday, we're recording. And yeah, I can feel the part of me that's been in a bit of a rush. And yeah, I just want to slow down and just be really present right now. So I'm just going to voice that into the space. We've had a baby shower. We've had so many amazing things, lots of family staying I put a drill bit through my finger right in the middle of the baby shower, Sarah, or the baby blessing that you guys are a part of, and I scream, I squealed, squealed. We had

Meg O'Neill:

a my beautiful friends put on, like a mother blessing ceremony for me before we had our afternoon, like baby barbecue, baby shower. And, yeah, we're in the living room, and we had this, like, actual hurdling squeal, yeah, and Jacob had put a drill bit through his finger. Well, your brother had put the drill bit through your

Jacob O'Neill:

finger. Not intentionless, but the way that he laughed afterwards, felt like it was

Meg O'Neill:

intentional. It was so intense. We were like it was in a very like beautiful, ceremonial part of the entire experience. And we just hear this, fuck you.

Jacob O'Neill:

There's something really endearing about those moments with like, men in my life, I quite enjoy like, there's something about like, getting hurt with your mates that just makes sense as a man, like a bonding experience. A bonding experience, I don't think it's something that I don't see a lot of women experiencing those sort of things, but like, it was such a dumb thing to do. And I was so, I was so conscious that you guys were in ceremony too. And I was like, Oh, I've got to be really quiet. So we went down the street with this drill bit, trying to drill a hole in a crystal. And you were down the street, down on the other side of the on the other side of the trailer, like we'd walk that's yeah, so that I Yeah, it was okay. It was very loud, but yeah. And we're just super grateful for all of our friends and family and how generous they were. Like, we got pretty much everything that we've needed for the baby and for us. And, yeah, yeah, we've put in, like, we've got meal meal vouchers. We've ordered all these beautiful meals from our friend Malena at the life harvest, and,

Meg O'Neill:

my gosh, I'm so excited for how well fed I'm going to be postpartum, yeah? And

Jacob O'Neill:

everything's just flowing, yeah, it's all it's getting sort of to the tail end of the pregnancy, right? It

Meg O'Neill:

is. And we just had some things unfold with the way the birth was, like, who was going to be here at our birth? That's changed. It shifted.

Jacob O'Neill:

Yeah, we've 36 weeks pregnant, and it's all perfect, and

Meg O'Neill:

it feels real, like it feels I'm, I'm really unbelievably grateful. It just feels really incredible that, you know, life unfolded in the way it has to have this other woman that's going to attend now instead, yeah, and I feel really, yeah. I feel like life, in the last week has initiated me into, like, deeper levels of trust coming into birth. And you know when, like, how this is on. I don't want to go into details, but we had a particular birth keeper coming in who can no longer make it, and we've now I've got another birth keeper coming, but there was like, half a day, or maybe a few hours where there was like, Oh, we don't have anyone coming to our birth and we don't have anyone supporting us, which I

Jacob O'Neill:

think was necessary to feel the I think we we both were like, Oh, we could do this on our you. You definitely felt that I could do this on on we could do this on our own. I probably wasn't as strongly convicted in that, but if that was the way it was going to go, I was happy to follow that thread, but to feel that kind of feel the void of not having a birth keeper for that four hours and then meeting the lady who's supporting us now, it was like. Like, Oh, yeah, this is, this is an integral role, and it feels really good to have someone in our corner totally.

Meg O'Neill:

And it was at the beginning of our pregnancy, I was like, oh, maybe it's just meant to be you and me at the birth. And I feel like, potentially, there is going to be a future birth that we have where it is just you and me and then maybe someone else, our friend or a family member here, looking after our other children. Yeah, I like, that's I would love to experience. I truly feel like that's going to be part of our experience. And I thought potentially that we, like, you know, that could be potentially where life was calling us for this first birth. But, yeah, as soon as this, this first birth keeper was unable to attend anymore, there was this part of me that was like, Oh no, I do not want that. Like, even though we're having a medically unassisted birth, and that's the plan right now, I still want someone there, like holding the space, filling up the pool, like, you know, just like holding the holding the container. And so, yeah, that that just the way that that's unfolded. And I just feel I'm so fucking proud of myself and us, you know, because I am. I'm 36 weeks pregnant, and that unfolded. So like, Yeah, I'm just really proud of the level of trust I've had through this pregnancy, and obviously doing a wild pregnancy, like, we haven't had scans, we haven't had haven't been to a doctor, I haven't, you know, had a midwife, anything like that. There has been a level of trust, but also that hasn't felt hard for me. There hasn't been a moment where I'm like, should I get a scan? Should I have a midwife? I Oh my gosh, where is the baby? What? What position is the baby in like, Is the baby growing like? There's I haven't, I honestly haven't felt any of that. I've just been in the depth of trust the entire time. And when this unfolded this week, there were moments that that wobbled me. And so I think that was just important for me to feel and like to I almost had to practice trust this week, where I haven't had to actively practice it, because it's just been like anchored in my system. So that's been really beautiful. And perhaps that's something I really need coming into the birth to to remember, like trust as an active practice. Yes, because no doubt, bringing this baby Earth side is going to require deep, deep, deep, deep trust right of

Jacob O'Neill:

passage, baby, yeah, yeah. And just honoring your capacity to feel it rather than project it or make it about something outside of you. I think it was a really beautiful moment to see you. And also gave me a little taste of like, oh, like, there's going to be things in this birth experience that I'm not going to be able to feel or do for you. And my job is to not make it about my discomfort and not make it about I want to change or fix this for you, and completely the path is the path. So, yeah, I'm a bit jealous of me giving birth. Yeah, which I could give birth.

Meg O'Neill:

You're saying that kind of in a jokey way, but I know deep down, yeah, genuine.

Jacob O'Neill:

I have a true belief that everything that a man creates is in je is, is an act of jealousy for the fact that he cannot create life. So he creates everything as grand and as tall and as big and as shiny as he possibly can in an attempt to get close to what it would feel like to grow and give birth to life. Wow.

Meg O'Neill:

I remember Leon saying that the poetry night we went to, and he was saying that, like men, women don't have to actually go out and, you know, create rites of passage for themselves. Because we have innate rites of passage in our body. We have our bleed. You know, if a woman chooses or has the experience of pregnancy and birth, we have menopause. We have, like all of these, body based rites of passages. They

Jacob O'Neill:

must defend. The stages of womanhood are defined by your body totally, like, it's, it's physiology is kind of, yeah, we

Meg O'Neill:

have physiological rights of passage, yeah. And he was saying that this is like, men go out and create, whether it's like, you know, you know, what's a rite of passage that a man might go out, yeah? Like any of these things, and maybe traditional things as well, like men are going out to almost like, create their own initiation and rite of passage. Yeah? That might be similar to a birth experience, yeah, or similar to a birth experience where you, part of you has to die and be reborn. Yeah,

Jacob O'Neill:

yeah. Women birth, birth life from the womb, and men birth like their their what do they call like? Men birth their gift to the world from their wound, which is revealed through an initiatory experience. And that's what Leon speaks about. Like women bleed. Like, women bleed like from like, from the womb. And men like have to go out and find a like. They have to find a way to bleed. And it's like the wound is what bleeds. So that's, that's the whole concept of rites of passage for men, which I think is really cool, because that's where you'll get the gift of life comes from your womb. Like the gift of you know, the gift that men have to give the world comes from his core wound. And that's kind of what needs to be nurtured in men, which is kind of physiologically built in to women's bodies.

Meg O'Neill:

Yeah, even what came to me then was like Sundance. And like, you know, we know a few people that have done Sundance, and then Native American tradition, and they, you know, they have the piercings, the piercings, but only men really do that, because, and the way that beautiful Harvey described it was like, Oh, well, women, we already bleed. We're already making our sacrifice and our blood offering to the Earth, where men create these, these piercings, so that they're, like, offering their blood to the earth. Yeah, yeah, it's so cool. And I love, oh, it's so beautiful. Like, I love, yeah, like so many, I would say, if not all traditional indigenous cultures, you know, honor and revere the feminine and the physiological rites of passage of women, and the power in that, and the wisdom and the depth of connection in that. And not just women see that in themselves in traditional cultures, but like the whole culture reveres that, and it's it's so beautiful, yeah, okay, should we get into this Q and A? Let's do the Q and A. We're Q and A today. Beautiful people. These are all questions from women. Shall we dive in?

Jacob O'Neill:

Let's dive right in.

Meg O'Neill:

Okay. First question, how do you talk to a male partner about how to touch you in the bedroom and also when you want to explore new things without being in teaching mode, or making him feel like he has to do it sorry, or making him feel like he has been doing it wrong before. Can I dive in first you do it. I'm just huge on being desire led in this. And this is the same. This is the same. And I speak about this in all of relate, all of you know a relationship. I often say underneath every complaint is a desire. So maybe there is, and this, again, in and out of the bedroom. Maybe in the bedroom, the complaint is he goes too fast. He's never, like, actually present with my body, or like he goes too fast, would be the complaint, okay, there's a desire underneath that. You know what? You don't want the complaint. If you bring the complaint, he is most likely, yeah, going to feel like he is doing something wrong. It's going to create contraction. So my, my, the my suggestion, and the deepest practice in this would be like, find the desire and being able be able to communicate that desire. So this could sound like, oh, it would feel really good if you slowed down right now. Oh, it would feel really good if, you know, fill in the blank, or I would love it right now. If, yeah, that can so it doesn't have to be like, No, that doesn't feel good. Do this instead, you know, if, and also, I want to really just, like, bring it in here that, yes, obviously you're allowed to say no. You're allowed to be strong in the bedroom, when, when boundaries are being crossed, and sometimes it is very needed in those kind of moments, right? But if there's particular, you know, if, if you just, if there is just this energy of, like, I just would love it. If you slow down right now, you can bring that in a desire led way without focusing on, he's going too fast and he's not present. You get to focus on like, oh, like, leading him with your desire, expressing that desire into the space and, and I think, can, I said, here? Yes, I just want to speak into the part of the question where it says, without being in teaching mode, when you're leading with desires, it's not, it doesn't necessarily have that energetic of of teaching. So if you were to say, oh, it would feel like it would feel really good if you slowed down. Oh, can you go a little to the left? Oh, actually, I'm not ready to be entered yet. It would feel really good for me, if you, you know, can you lick my pussy again? Can you do this again? Like, right? It's not necessarily, like, hey, I want to get off and you've gone into like, you've tried to penetrate me too quickly. But you need to know that I need more time like, you know, it can just be this. Hey, it would feel really good. I would love it if Yeah,

Jacob O'Neill:

and to sort of second what you've said, I think that it's really important to use like, your like, communicate with your entire body and your. And your sounding, I think that's a really important thing. If you if, if it feels very kind of logically, like, Oh, hey, can you just, hey, it'll feel really good if you slowed down and you kind of didn't like, you could use your body in a more powerful way. And I think that's part of the feeling process. So like, consent and, you know, Own your no and all of that yes and like, his responsiveness will be, I believe, is, can be determined by the amount that your body is communicating as well,

Meg O'Neill:

yes, and that is, I would say, becoming responsive in and out, like throughout an entire sexual experience. Because, you know, like I've become a very responsive woman in the bedroom. So you know, even if I'm not saying it, you know, from my breath, from my from the physical movements of my body, whether I'm fully there or not, you can tell in my body whether I've closed or contracted, and that's because when I'm open and I'm turned on, and I'm really there, I'm letting you know that through my breath, through my sound, yeah,

Jacob O'Neill:

100% and there's, like, two things that I want to, like, acknowledge, which are really important to be in the space. Is, like, as a man, you are not responsible for your woman's turn on like that's something that she must own and claim and bring through and speak her desires from a turn. Okay, she's not a light switch. You don't just turn her on or she's not a car that you turn on and let warm up like there is a there is a mutual experience occurring here. It's not 100% your responsibility to get her off or turn her on. And as a woman, you are not responsible for a man's reactivity to your desire being voiced. If he takes that open, loving, you know, beautiful invitation that you present, and he takes that personally and he's reactive, that's not your responsibility to make him feel to retract it and make him feel comfortable, if your desire wobbles him. And the good that's a sign that there's a space for you guys to grow into. And I know there's been times where you have, yeah, definitely been open and inviting with that, and I've taken it personally, and it's only because there's a truth in it. I'm rushing, and I've had to slow down and connect with my breath and take some time, so they're the two things that I'm really conscious of. Was like, yeah, a man isn't responsible for a woman's turn on, and a woman isn't responsible for a man's reactivity when she brings her desires, if he takes it personally. And

Meg O'Neill:

I think I just want to deepen into what you're saying around a man isn't responsible for a woman's turn on for the women listening. What Jacob's really saying is, don't just lie there and expect that he knows exactly where to touch and exactly how to do it. And this question isn't saying that at all. This question's like, I want to teach him. I want to teach him, Yeah, but how do I not like, you know, teach him where he feels wrong. But this is important. Like, no, no matter how good a lover, your partner is like every body. Every physical body is different. So although there might be globally, you know, a particular way that women like to be touched or, you know, pleasured, every woman is going to be very different. So it's your responsibility to be able to express what feels good to you and communicate what turned that feels good for you, and communicate your turn ons or communicate your turn offs. And yeah, that is your responsibility. If you're not seeing that as your responsibility, you are going to be outsourcing that to him and kind of being like, well, he doesn't, he didn't touch that, Ryan, so that, yeah, your whole entire sex life will change when you actually take responsibility for that and become, become a woman that is not only willing to express that, but but knows, but it, but is expressing that and knows that's a very important part of of experiencing deep levels of pleasure and intimacy. Yeah,

Jacob O'Neill:

and the, the key thing for me there is, like, staying engaged in the experience as a woman, you know, let the desire be moving through your body as you're you're in the experience, like, start to like, yeah, use like, that's a big thing for me. And I think because we've had experiences where you've spoken to desire, and then I've, like, felt responsible for it, and but then I haven't communicate, yeah, and it's created clunkiness. And that's, you know, pointing this to a deeper, you know, a deeper connection anyway, but I just really, I really feel that like there is a, there can be a and from the work that I've done and the men that I support, there's been a common thread. It's not every man, but there's a feeling like I have to make sure that she gets off, otherwise I'm not a good lover. And there is a really beautiful thing, and like, when a woman takes full responsibility for her turn on, then the desire comes from the fullness of her her being and the forms of her having a relationship with her body. And it's not just like, hey, do this so I can get get here. And it doesn't become. Around, like the teacher. It's like, Hey, you do this, and this will happen for me. Yeah,

Meg O'Neill:

I want to also add that, like, if you're a man, listening to this, bringing your curiosity is so beautiful. Like, if you were, if a woman could, if, if a woman can feel the part of you that's like, I want to pleasure you. Like, what feels good? Like it feels the part of you that really wants to learn her body and wants, wants to understand what feels good and what doesn't feel good. And that's like, so beautiful. So, like, bring your hunger to learn. Like, let her feel your hunger to learn as well. Um,

Jacob O'Neill:

last, Can I say one more thing on that? Yeah, yeah. So the words Meg, I think she said, like, softer or slower. Like the like describing words are really powerful for a man as well. Rather than like, direct like this, real direct like this is how you need to touch me for me to get here. It's like actually being in the almost like the communication is part of the dance. And I really like the words harder, softer or slower and faster. And they're really great descriptive words that can kind of like be turned up or turned down. So the difference between, like, a man going maybe a man's going 10% too fast, right? He's just getting a little excited, and rather than you being saying, Don't do that. Well, I don't like that, my love, can you slow down a little? I want to really feel you inside of me. It's a completely different invitation, completely different type of communication. Then I don't know. No, I don't like that. And you have every right to say that. Like, if you like, please don't ever feel that you don't have a voice in the bedroom. I want that to be known. But there's like, if you are like, if it is like, 10% too fast, and you know that slowing down 10% would like, really, really feed you, rather than saying, I don't like that. Can you use the words My love, can you slow down a little? I really want to feel you inside of me. Yeah,

Meg O'Neill:

I always like to say like, and again, can you slow down a little perfect, or, Oh, it feels really good for me if you slowed down or like, it would feel really like, I think this is a part of a woman owning her feeling as well. Like it would feel really good. Oh, this is feeling Yeah, like, to really own that as well.

Jacob O'Neill:

Do you not like that. I don't really like that, yeah. Personally, it doesn't. It would feel really good for me. That triggers my like, oh, then I have to do it for you. Like, I don't know why that. That wobbles me for a little bit. Yeah, okay, yeah. But I like the idea when you say, like, I want to feel you inside of me. Like, slow my love. Can you slow down? I want to feel you inside, there's like, and

Meg O'Neill:

I guess that's the same thing owning it. It's like, I wanna, she's expressing what she wants to feel. Yeah,

Jacob O'Neill:

okay, I haven't been like. I also know that I have a habit of, like, putting other people like, I have been a people pleaser and a nice guy, and that kind of tendency is like, ah. And if it's feeling in the I guess it's, it's a like, I said, it's the calibration, like, that might be feeling really good for me, and if I've dropped out of consciousness, and you say that, it's like, I've forgotten about you, and I'm rushing again. But, um, yeah, I don't think there's any right or wrong. And every it gets, it's

Meg O'Neill:

get to play. But I think that that's something that just like, owning that, I think, owning the desire, yeah, like you said, Oh, can you slow down? I want to feel this. Or can you see? Yeah, I think that's beautiful, and I like that. You said that the slower, faster, like, it doesn't have to be like, this whole descriptive teaching of, like, Hey, can you slow down? Because, because we haven't, like it takes a woman about 40 minutes to be turned on, and my vestibular bulbs are not ever swollen and erect right now. Like, it doesn't have to be that. You don't have to tell him why you want him to slow down. It could literally just be, like you said, it's slower or faster, harder or softer, like you can just advocate for that. And it can just be as simple as that. I just want to speak into one other part of this question, which says, how to talk to a man, your male partner, when you want to explore new things in the bedroom as well. And I think this is this can be true for the other part of the question around like, how when you want to teach him how to touch you in a different way. I am a big advocate for having conversations outside of the bedroom. Yes, so like, yes in the moment, you know, expressing and being responsive to what's unfolding. But also, let's, let's say, for example, you are feeling like this kinky side of you come alive and you're wanting to explore, like, I'd love to be tied up, or I'd love, like, want to know what it feels like to have a hand around my throat, or like to be spanked. Like, if that part of you is coming alive and you'd want, you want it you want you would like to explore that. First of all, the desire date would be amazing. Just

Jacob O'Neill:

do the desire, do the desired, please. Well, put in the show notes. We'll put

Meg O'Neill:

the link in the show notes, but we. Created this date night experience. It's like, $27 It's phenomenal, but I do want to add something to this, and it's that, again, leading with desire of like, Hey, I've been feeling these things like, there's this part of me that wants to get a little kinky, and I've been feeling this part of me that would love, and you can even if that feels really nerve wracking for you to say, like maybe you've been in a 10 year relationship and you've had the same sex the entire 10 years, and suddenly you're like, I want something new. That's probably going to be shit fucking scary to have that conversation right, to do something different after a decade of making love in a particular way. And so again, you can express that into the space like, Oh, hey, I have something to share, and it actually makes me feel a bit nervous. Are you open to hearing it? It's about our sex life. You know, I'm feeling this kinky part of me come alive, and I really want to know what it would feel like to like have your hand around my throat, or for you to spank me when we're having sex? Or, yeah, these things, these new desires, are coming alive for me. Like, what, how would you feel about that? Or would you be open to exploring that together? So it's like leading with a desire and expressing what's alive for you, and then inviting your partner into it. Like, basically, this is what I desire. What are your thoughts on that? Or are you open to that?

Jacob O'Neill:

Definitely do the desire date, yes

Meg O'Neill:

or like, that's

Jacob O'Neill:

this really facilitate, really the structure of it. And what I feel is that when you do the desire date, you've got a, you've got a kind of, like someone holding the space in the in the in, like the guided pave. You've got structure. One of the things that can overwhelm a man in this is that, number one, he'll be like, Oh, I'm not I should be doing better. I'm not good enough. It'll bring up his I'm not enough. Wound and maybe, no, I would say, like, 99.9% of the time it will, yeah, I would, I would argue that, like with all of the men that I've worked with there is it will bring that up, like, even if it's just a twinge, because it's like, oh, like, for it's like, oh, there's this, you want more. And if he hasn't done a lot of work, and if this is a question, like, oh, how do I bring it without teaching? It's like, well, then, like, you, yeah, I believe there's a, yeah, having the desired data as as a facilitated experience, where you've got sort of, you're both in it together, is really important. So it's not like you're having to sort of bring him along, or teach him, or show him. And the second part of like, what can overwhelm a man is like, sometimes it can feel like, if there isn't that structure, that he's being dropped in the middle of the ocean with no land in sight, like a woman's desires can, can see, can can seem and feel endless to a man who has been doing the same thing over and over again, not just in the bedroom, but in all of his life. He might not have variety. He may have chosen comfort. He may not have been celebrated for his adventurous spirit, and that might have been squashed, so he's learned to play it safe. So that feeling can be quite overwhelming. So Don't hide your desires, please, like they're an important part of of like, really, uh, cultivating his masculinity like you, the more you, the more you're able to bring those, the more he's going to expand and and create this beautiful masculine container for you to just melt into. And there is a there is there can be like, with anything the emotional aspect, the emotional foreplay of like, okay, how can I deliver this to my man, which is what you said outside of the bedroom is so important in the moment, can be, can be a little it can feel a little brash. I can feel like, oh, okay, well, got it, okay, and then, but that's all part of it. I think that's all part of it. Like one of you going into your head and then feeling the awkwardness and then coming back, and it's a dance. But I just really want to, like, advocate that, like, if you're a man, or if your partner is a man, and he's and you feel that you can see that he's like, such a great guy that does all of the things, and it always shows up, but doesn't have that. I guess, that curiosity around the adventurous stuff, especially in the bedroom, there is a way to bring it, and that desire date, I believe, creates safety. And I've had so many men who've done it, and they're just like, Oh my God, I didn't know this was available. Didn't know we could do this and

Meg O'Neill:

just facilitating those kind of conversations that can be uncomfortable and that can sometimes we want to have those kind of conversations of to expand our sex life. But yeah, some people just don't. Many people don't know where to even begin. Um, so, yeah, the desire day is just like, phenomenal.

Jacob O'Neill:

I want to I'm really passionate about this. The other thing is that he may be in that the what Meg, you know, talks about the homemaker and the whore. He may, he may be seeing you in that lie. He's like, Oh, I can't look. I. Want you to be looked after and have a home, and, you know, have all of the all the comforts, and I want to look after you, and I want to treat you like a like a princess. I can't show you. I can't Yeah, and you know, he has to build a relationship with his own inner beast, which is, you know, learning to actually cultivate that and learning how to bring that through cleanly. Every man really should go on that journey. But if he's been, why hardwired to believe like you're precious and can't be, you know you're meant to be put up on the pedestal. And everything, you know, everything that he does, is in service to you, and you know you having a very safe and secure life. Then when the whore, like bears her fangs and wants to be, you know, dripping in Eros and feeling all of the pleasure rippling through her body, if that's not something that he's aware of, can coexist with the with that like that can be a really great conversation as well. Like, hey, I love all that you do for me. I love being this, but there's also a part of me that is, like aching to be fair, and I want to explore it with you. Yeah, and like, I'm not in a rush, but I'm also not going to, this isn't going to go anywhere.

Meg O'Neill:

Yeah, and again, a conversation to be had outside of the bedroom. Totally like, if you if you want to be choked and spanked, and I'm just using this as an example, like, that kind of side of BDSM or king, that's probably not something to like mid sex to be like, hey, choke me. And you've never had that. You've never had that you've never played in that dynamic. You've never expressed that that's something that you want, that probably would feel jarring if you've been having, you know, the same kind of sex with your partner. So again, you know, go do the desire day with your partner, and this will facilitate, then some, some more explorative experiences. Definitely

Jacob O'Neill:

the one, one last thing that I want to say this is, this is a really important conversation for like, I just know there's so many women that are aching to be fed in this way. Yeah, and like, really understanding men is important for this. Like, because, like, I get the feeling there's a lot of women with, with, with men that are good servants, but maybe not like able to meet them deeply in this, this arena. What did I want to say now? I forgot after I just had one more thing to say. Next question. Just give me, like, 10 more seconds to try and remember it Okay, damn. Oh, that's what I want to say. The The other thing that I feel like we use the kink, you know, like chokes bank, that you know, that kind of language, but there may also be a desire for, like, deeper presence from him. So maybe eye gazing is what you want more of. Maybe you want to breathe together first. Maybe you want to feel that intimacy build. And that's can be uncomfortable for a man as well if he hasn't really, you know, done, done some inner work. So I just want to say, you know, the kink stuff, yes, fuck yes. Love that. And if you're feeling that, and you want to bring that. But there's also this other part of like him being able to attune to your body, or be able to like, deliver the hand on the throat with love, to be able to spank with love, to be able to Yes, treat you in that way from a place of love. As to, how do I actually get him to, like, become aware of the subtleties of my body. And how can you begin, almost begin to read the instrument that I, that I am, I

Meg O'Neill:

actually think that's so important, because our doorway into kinkier sex, or more like BDSM dynamics, was through we were having very in like, you know, I even found a Post this morning about us doing like naked yoga and going to a tantric naked yoga class like, sort of in, like, nine years ago. And so that if a man doesn't have an attunement to a woman's body and isn't able to create safety, which a huge part of creating safety for a woman in the bedroom is deep present and attunement to her body, if that, if those ingredients aren't there, that's not going to be a safe partner to enter into BDSM style dynamics, yes, to be dominated by, to submit to. And so, yeah, I think those, yeah, I just love that you said that I'd never thought of that in Well, I had, but not in that particular way, in terms of our trajectory as well. I

Jacob O'Neill:

I really love the podcast I did with Alan McGrath. I learned a lot, and remind me a lot of the stuff that I probably hadn't, hadn't really sat with for a while. And he said, If you can't create intimacy, you shouldn't be practicing polarity. And I'm paraphrasing and kind of saying that in my own words there. But essentially, like, if you're not creating intimacy in your relationship, you shouldn't be practicing polarity, because the connection isn't there. So that, for me, is like a really good you know, I think the kink and the and the I think that's all I think it's all of it. I don't think it's one or the other. So for me, like creating that intimacy and. Taking the time to connect, whether that's in the bedroom when you're eye gazing, or taking a moment to like, breathe together, or whether it's like connecting and actually having dinner together. And you know, talking about your desires like that intimacy will almost lay the foundations for polarity and the hand on the throat and the the kind of the richness of pleasure to reveal itself. I feel like I feel good,

Meg O'Neill:

yeah, and I have a few, I have a few guests lined up, or that I'm, I'm in conversation with right now that are more in the kink, BDSM space, so I need to get those guests

Jacob O'Neill:

on, please, before I give birth. That's really important, because it's

Meg O'Neill:

just someone to speak really deeply into the because I, yeah, we've even BDSM. For example, people who practice BDSM, like boundaries, communication, safety, all of these things are almost like amplified so deeply, because you can't be practicing those things safely without those kind of conversations and that kind of and a very high level of communication. So, yeah, definitely want to have a deeper conversation with a guest around this and, yeah, yeah,

Jacob O'Neill:

that's the key piece, I think, too, like the that's, I'm really excited for you to interview those people, because that's something that I'm still learning more about, it myself as well. How do I and I think that's the piece that Alan really dropped on me. Was like, oh, create intimacy and then practice polarity love, and that's something that I I'm really, really I can it feels right in my in my body, in my bones. So Okay, next question, next question,

Meg O'Neill:

how to create sexual tension or keep desire alive in a long term relationship, especially if your man is always exhausted or busy.

Jacob O'Neill:

So that was a long pause. Do

Meg O'Neill:

you want me? I've got things to say on this, if you don't. Right now,

Jacob O'Neill:

one thing that I would like be really the one thing that like what the because I know what that feels like to be tired and exhausted. Don't underestimate the power of nourishing touch and it leading toward like intimacy and then leading towards the passion that would be my, my what feels right for me to say on that?

Meg O'Neill:

Yeah, and I think there's a few pieces here. I think that if you can, if you can really see that your man doesn't have much to give in a particular season of life, you could really step in and be like, Wow, how can I be a great lover in this moment? Yes, I know I want to feel his beast and yes, I want him to throw me up against a wall and take me. But right now he doesn't, I don't feel like he has the capacity for that, just with how much is giving in life. So how can I, you know, be the best lover to him. Is that nourishing touch, is that a massage? Is that worshiping his cock? Is that, whatever it might be, yeah, like switching that focus and seeing, you know, that could be the doorway to the intimacy that you're really aching for. So that would be my first piece. Second piece is if this doesn't just feel like a season, also, if this feels like something that is has been showing up a lot in the relationship, and this is ours has been more a season, but this has been showing up for like, you've been really full and busy in the last few months, and this is something that I've brought is like, Oh, hey, like, I really feel like, like our sex and intimacy hasn't been a priority for you, and it's such a priority for me. And I'm yeah, like, I really want this part of me to be fed, even we spoke about this on the last podcast or the one before that. Like, there's this dirty little whore in me that wants to be fed. So, yeah, this first piece around like, how can you nourish him? Or how can you bring like, nourishment can also be from the super slutty part of you that worships his cock, or that you know is just like giving to him, or putting lingerie on and cooking dinner. Like there can still be you can nourish him with your sexual aliveness and your sexual energy. It doesn't always have to be. I think sometimes when we are women that really ache for our men to dominate us, let's just say and lead us sexually, we always think, or we're always waiting to feel his power in that, and to feel his initiation in that, or initiative in that. And that doesn't always have to be the case. We can really lead like our sexual aliveness and our eroticism can really feed him. But that second piece I was just speaking into would be, yeah, expressing a desire like, Hey, I. Would I'm I'm really wanting, I'm really wanting to ignite, Ignite us, our sex life. And you know I've been and, you know I've been feeling, you know that, that maybe that doesn't feel important to you right now, but I'd love to hear what, what, what you have to say on that. Also, we spoke about this on another podcast, the reality of being in a long term relationship, maybe having businesses or working and maybe having children like you've got to be very intentional with creating an environment for sex and intimacy to thrive. So maybe this conversation is you bringing the desire forward and saying, Hey, I would love like deeper intimacy. And like, I would love to, yeah, I want to, like, feel really sexually connected right now. I'd love to have a conversation around, like, what, what we can do in our life to really support that to happen. Because I know when you get home, you're really tired and sex does feel hard, and then you're up early in the morning and like, life happens. And just actually knowing that it's, it's, it's about creating, yeah, an environment for that to be to unfold, yeah.

Jacob O'Neill:

And at the core of it is, like, quality of connection, yeah, yeah. And that's important, quality of connection. And if that quality of connection isn't there, then your woman is going to feel fed, therefore the family unit will fall apart. It's like, yeah, natural order. And I feel that that's something that as a man, we can take responsibility for tending to the container, but not what's in it. It's like, and that can be, and that can be kind of where we lose sight of the important pieces.

Meg O'Neill:

What do you make? Can you give us, like, more specific house,

Jacob O'Neill:

okay, providership, the protectorship. And like, I'm never actually present with the things that I'm that's in, that's in the actual container that I've created. It's like, I am I actually in? Do I actually make time and prioritize and say no to other things and like, make my my wife feel chosen, claimed, and if I don't, then how am I going to do that in an appropriate way so I can still do the other things that need to get done, but I don't drop the ball here, and you will. I think that's part of part of learning, is that you drop the ball and then you're invited back into Hey, this is important to me. So I've found that that's the and we spoke a little bit about this. But like, getting out of the environment, maybe if you do work from home, or maybe if, like, the home is a place where you feel, you look around like I haven't done that, that, that, it will take you away from the moment. So maybe it's like, we're going out to dinner and we're leaving the phones at home. We're going out, we're going to the beach for the whole day. Yeah, we're packing food. We're going to be there. And you created one thing that I will say for men is, like, create a large enough window for you to actually wind down and unplug from whatever is going on else in your life. Do you think that you can just get home cut ties with work and all of the responsibility, and then instantly switch on and be like, deeply present with your woman. You're going to have a hard time with that. Yeah. So find a way that is like, Okay, well, like, I need, you know, for us, if we're going to go on a date, maybe it's four hours. I need four hours, because the first hour I might still be like, there's still be things that I'm I'm letting go of, and then once we're in, then that, and I found that works really good for me, a longer period of time together to land that is really important, rather than, like, being able to, like, shop at five o'clock every afternoon be like, boom, all right, Yep, I'm here. I'm present. Let's go.

Meg O'Neill:

Yeah. Just like little things too, because I'm just really focusing on this part of the question that says, you know, how do we create sexual tension and desire in long term relationship? But if your man is always exhausted and busy again nourishing him and like, How can I support you? How can I nourish you? You can even have, like, have that conversation, um, or ask that question. Another thing is, like throughout the day, like maybe it is, maybe it is doing something that you've never done before. Have you ever sent him a nude while he's at work? Like using this, like building your eroticism, and knowing that you can experience and express and be in your eroticism, whether you're having lots of sex or not, and actually that that's that's going to feed you, and that's also going to feed him, and not using it. It's like, oh, not, not like, I'm going to use this so he wants to have sex with me. No, like, what if it was like, Oh, I'm going to come alive, and I'm going to bring this part of me really alive, so that I'm fed, and I'm feeling fed, but also, so it's, this is a gift to the relationship. So, yeah, maybe it's like, okay, this week I'm gonna, like, send a few nudes without even letting him know. Or I'm gonna self pleasure and send him a photo, like, while he's at what, like, something you like, doing something that you've never fucking done before. That's kind of gonna like, oh,

Jacob O'Neill:

like, What the fuck. Even, like, even if you're not comfortable sending nudes, that's totally okay. Like an SMS, and this is, you know, like a text of like, Oh, I wish your cock was in my mouth, right? I wish you're inside of me, like, that sort of stuff. Like, it will, it will, like, prick up his ears.

Meg O'Neill:

Prick up his what his

Jacob O'Neill:

ears will become erect. He'll feel a little hot and flush. It's like, oh yeah. You've just, like, entered his field. You've just taken up space. And you're like, Hey, I'm here. Yeah.

Meg O'Neill:

And something I take say time and time again to women is, like, the price we pay as women to be fully expressed and fully liberated is awkward and uncomfortable. And for many women, even like, I was never someone who could give you a striptease or, you know, express that part of me to you that felt so fucking uncomfortable. And I never thought I'd be the kind of woman to send a nude or send a sexy text message. And if that feels like, you know, there has to be a genuine yes for you, like, Oh my gosh. That feels edgy and awkward and uncomfortable, and how is he going to receive that? But I actually want to do it, yeah. Like, lean into the discomfort. Lean into the part of you that's like, Oh my gosh. Again, especially if you're in a long term relationship and you've never sent a nude or that was like, in the first months of your relationship, and you haven't in years and years and years. Like, you know, you've got to actually, what's that fucking Einstein quote. Definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again and expecting different results. It's like, yeah, if you want to shake shit up in your sex life, shake shit up. Do something different. Put it, inject a new energy into this space.

Jacob O'Neill:

Yeah. And the key thing here is, like, if you're wanting something deeper from him, can you give something deeper from yourself? I think that's and that goes both ways. Yeah, that's not just for women in this disregard. I don't want to just think that, Oh, if I want something, I've always got to give more. But it's like, yeah, you're aching for a depth of passion, then bring through, like, a passion that he's never felt for me before that the news that, the cheeky, sort of dirty text, is it, is it the like he walks home, it walks into you, like, in your, in your naked in the kitchen, like, is it like, take up space in his awareness, that like feel and that in a way that feeds him?

Meg O'Neill:

Yeah. Is it one night going, Okay, I'm gonna, I want to give you a massage. And you, you know, give him a full body massage, and maybe it ends at his cock, and you're just work, you're you're just like, worshiping his cock, like, what if that was? What would it feel like to offer that level of your own lovership and your own generosity in that way? Yeah. And again, I want to also just bring in that you could do all of these things. And if that's not, if you're then not feeling that, that sense of like, oh, I still don't feel like I'm being met in this, or I'm feeling I'm always having to initiate, and I'd like him to like a conversation, a conversation, bring your desires forth, see what needs to shift in your life, so that you can be experiencing this together. Yes, okay, next question. Sorry, I'm just there's a few questions here I want to just because we probably only have time for maybe one More, choose the best one. I

Jacob O'Neill:

Three, two,

Unknown:

okay, I

Meg O'Neill:

Yeah, okay, this one got it. And this came from a course that I recently did called The Art of art of loving a man, which was such a fucking phenomenal course. And one of the things I was teaching in that course, because women joined this the deepest desire, and the desire the purpose of this course, was for women who deeply yearned to feel their partner's leadership and to feel their man step up, and to feel like claimed and chosen and ravished in partnership. And so one of the things that I taught within that is that if you want to feel your man's leadership. You've got to stop thinking you know better than him, full stop. You've got to stop thinking that you always know how to stack the dishwasher better, or you always know the best directions, or you always know like, just like, letting go of this part of you that's that's a bit righteous in like, I know better, and so the way you're doing it is wrong. Yeah. One of the questions that I got from a few women in the course was, So will there ever be able to be times where I get to do it my way, if I really think I could do it better than him? And so I want to, I want us to speak into that, because, you know what I was. Saying in when you stop looking at your man and going, I know better than him, really, that's then like trusting Him to do the thing in the way that he wants to do it. So an example of this, and I use this example all the time, but it's like driving somewhere. He's dry, he's he's in the driver's seat and and Ivan do this. Let's use like, an example of our real life. You drive a different way home to me, and every time we pass the way that I would turn, there's a feeling in my body. Because I, when I drive, I turn there, there's a feeling in my body of like, oh, what's he doing that's not, this isn't the right way, where he's going, and yet I know that we're going to get home and probably the exact same amount of time. So I've never said anything, because I was able to now meet that part of me and go, why? What? What is that going to achieve me saying, Hey, you're going the wrong way. Hey, did you know, because I've put it in maps, that this is actually faster, maybe five seconds faster, like for me, I know what's the fucking point of telling you that? Right? I'm just going to trust that you are going to get us home, and that you enjoy going this way, and you choose this way for a particular reason. And I'm I'm just going to sit back and be a passenger princess and enjoy it and relax, relax. So when I've let go of the need to I know better than him What becomes possible. I get to relax, and I get to enjoy the journey, and I get to continue to create intimacy, maybe in the conversation we're having where, if I was to say, Hey, this is actually not the fastest way. This is actually wrong. You should have gone left. Like, do you think that's going to create deeper intimacy? No. And so the question here from this woman is like, Well, okay, what if there is a situation where I feel like I genuinely feel like I could do it in a better way, or I genuinely feel like I do know better or have more skills to offer in that moment. Like, what do I have to keep quiet? Like, yeah, join me to speak into this. Or do you want to? You can speak into it? Well, I would think, yeah, that's like, there's, I would say every woman knows the difference between when she's when she's thinking she knows best, versus when she genuinely has some that has something powerful to offer. And I think this is also when we as women need to connect really deeply into our bodies and like we know the difference between it's like when we're like, for me, that part of me that wants to tell you what to do, it's not a comfortable feeling. It feels grippy and tight and like, right? It feels controlling. There's a controlling aspect to that. And so it's, it's a, it's a, there's like a physical feeling that comes along with that part of me, whereas where I when I might have something to offer that's like, yeah, like, I genuinely or even, for an example of this, might be with the dog recently, you know, we're training our dog. And sometimes there's been, maybe I haven't been good at this sometimes, but I think other times I've been great at this. When I've been like, I'll share, like, Hey, you might be wrestling our dog on the ground, and obviously, because we're about to have a baby, we've had a trainer come in with the dog, and the trainer's like, don't wrestle the dog anymore, because then the dog thinks it's okay to nip. So when I notice you doing that, at times, I've been like, Hey, I it actually doesn't feel that great for me when you wrestle him. Because I really, yeah, it just makes me feel a bit nervous as to what's then he's going to be like, when the baby comes, and that feels heart led and genuine and like from this place of like, oh, this is important to me, and I really need you to feel this, versus just telling you what to do, because I don't trust you. Yes. Do you have anything to say on that thing,

Jacob O'Neill:

if it's what it means to you. Yeah, that's what I heard. Like, it doesn't feel good. Like, like, it's important for me to that we train the dog this way, because, as a, you know, mother with a young child, I don't want to have to, like, have any extra stress. Okay, cool, that's fair. That makes sense. Versus the I know better, like, if you believe, if you, if you think, you can do it better, and it's just like, what's, what's the outcome, I think, of like the children, like, children, like, it's children like, of course, you can do everything better than a child like, I'm just thinking of like a child that's like making a sandcastle and like the parent grabs the scent, like the shovel the bucket out of the child's sense, yeah, just let me do it. I'll just do that. Like, how does that make? Does that make make someone feel empowered, or make someone feel not good enough? Like, ask your. Self would me doing this instead of them, empower them or exacerbate their not enoughness, that's and if it's like, oh, this is it's not empowering, then why would I? Why would I do it? And

Meg O'Neill:

for women, there's going to be many moments where you realize, oh, what would be the outcome of this? Like, oh, I was just wanting to tell him that, because I think I know better, but it's actually when I control freak. Yeah, like, there's, there's, you're gonna have to meet the part of you. Often we just tell a man what to do because it makes us feel more comfortable. Yeah, because we're control comfortable. Yeah, because we're a control freak, because we're comfortable in control.

Jacob O'Neill:

And so I've been called a freak, but not a control I only say that because I know I'm a control freak, but

Meg O'Neill:

it's important that we acknowledge or like on this journey of being able to trust a man, and that is the only way of experiencing more of his power and leadership. You're constantly telling him what to do. That man's gonna go fuck that. I'm just gonna either, like, tap the fuck out and I'll just do it. I'll just do it whatever way because it's easier, like, you can tell me what to do because it's easier, or he's just gonna, like, fucking tap out and leave

Jacob O'Neill:

you'll create a mother, mother, mother, son, dynamic. Yeah, he'll just be living it'll be like, he's in a relationship with his mom, and it'll be a self fulfilling prophecy

Meg O'Neill:

of like, I'll see he can never get it right. He can never get it right. He can never get it right. He's always like, I've got to tell him what to do all the time. In

Jacob O'Neill:

his head. She doesn't she doesn't do anything. She doesn't appreciate me. I can't get a word and I can't do anything, right? God, this is and it's like you're both, you know, feeding yourselves a story that doesn't create connection, doesn't create intimacy, doesn't create passion. So really, is it that important that you can do it better? No,

Meg O'Neill:

if it feels genuinely like, if something feels genuinely unsafe or like it's, it's, it's really important to you, or it's value oriented in some way, of course, like, bring your heart through and share why that's important that he does it in a particular way. Or you share why you would like him to to or you why you want to offer your expression or your opinion about something. Of course, of course, of course, of course. But if you're just telling him what to do from a place of I know better. Look, look at him. He doesn't even know what he's doing. Like no, that is not the doorway to deeper intimacy, and that means on your journey to feeling more of his power, you're gonna have to sit in those moments and go and shut your fucking mouth and then be with the part of you that wants to say something. So let's use the example of driving again, the part of me that maybe wanted to say, oh, turn left. I've just got to take a few deep breaths and go. We're going to get home. What's the big deal? Maybe you take 10 seconds longer. Why do I need to tell him that? Do I Do I have the need to be right right now. Like, what is that like? And I can just see I have to sit with all of that in my own body, instead of just, like, projecting it onto him, and so I can just be like, Yeah, I am right. That is the right way. No, it's like being with the discomfort. That's how we unplug from control. That's how we become a space for a man that can really deeply lead us. Is we be with the discomfort of the part of us that wants to stay in control and feel safe in control.

Jacob O'Neill:

Yeah, there's, there is an underlying story or underlying belief that I see in women, where they are in this kind of they're playing out this dynamic is like, the only way for me to feel safe is to be in control. And that's deeply rooted in, like, the collective healing journey that women have to go on. Of like, there are safe men. There are men that when they take the lead, they do have your best interests at heart. And there has been a history where that wasn't true. Yeah. So this is, you know, this is your work, and on behalf of yourself and the women to come the next generations, like, this is your work to to like, teach your body to like, be in your body and be like, it's safe for me to let go of control.

Meg O'Neill:

Something I always say is like, treat him like, see him and treat him like a powerful fucking man. And so would you tell a powerful fucking man? Would you try and mother a powerful man. Would you try and micromanage every one of his decisions and everything he does around your home? No. And so the next time you want to do that, yeah, like, ah. And this is probably the piece between knowing, like, when to express something and when to bring something genuinely to the space, versus when not to okay, if, if I genuinely saw him as a powerful fucking man right now, would I feel the need to tell him this? Probably not, if it's coming from a controlling, micromanaging place, but yes, if it's coming from, oh no, this is genuine, and this is I need to share this, to bring this to the space and be witnessed in this so and if you struggle. Also, if the idea of seeing and treating a man like a powerful man feels really the fucking challenging, well, first of all, practice and know that, yes, there, there may have been many things which have you feeling like he's not, but if you're choosing to be in that relationship, that is your duty. Yes, that is your duty. If you want your relationship to improve, you cannot hold him hostage to this belief that he's not powerful, right? And he never gets it right like that. There's never that when you're holding a man in that energy or in that belief, you're never going to receive and able to be able to witness his power. There's probably 1000s of things he's doing in your relationship, where he's bringing his power, where you're not actually able to see it through the lens in which you're seeing him through right now.

Jacob O'Neill:

Yeah, totally,

Meg O'Neill:

okay, my love. There are a few more questions, but I think we'll leave it at that. I

Jacob O'Neill:

think that's yeah, I think that's a really nice, a nice sort of closure on the on the call, on the podcast. Yeah, perfect. Yeah. That's and like, I just, I think we it's nice to temper it with, like, a relationship, especially a long term one. It's a practice, and it's not about getting it right in every moment. It's about being, being to, like, to both of you, being willing. And I really just want to speak into the power of, like, I power of like, vulnerable conversations quite often lead to the deep connection and the fulfilling of desires. And I think if you can, like, be awkward or be Clum like, clumsy and clunky with your words, but your heart is open that speaks like levels to your willingness. And just like Meg said, too, like, if you can breathe down the need to control and like, not necessarily, like, override a man's leadership, and you can give him that space to drive you home the way he wants to drive home. Like, what happens when you guys get in the house, like, what, what becomes available to you, like, this is, yes, it's in service to Him, but then nothing goes one way.

Meg O'Neill:

And I love that you brought that through, because that might seem like such a simple thing, that the driving thing, and that's why I use that example a lot, because it is a really simple thing. But I love that you said what becomes possible, not just in that moment, but if you weren't to say anything, and if you were to just trust Him in that moment, what becomes possible when you walk through the door? What becomes possible later at night when you're lying beside each other like these micro moments of just offering him trust and respect go so fucking far when we're relating to men, yes, and the opposite is the same. It's like these chipping away at a man like, Oh, you're not going the right way. Oh, that's not how to do it. They might seem so small, but it goes a long fucking way.

Jacob O'Neill:

The dripping tap, yeah, the

Meg O'Neill:

death by 1000 cuts, that's it. Okay. All right. Thanks. Me in here for the Q. A, my loves. If you ever have a question that you want us to answer on the podcast, you can either send it through to whether they want to send it to our to our Instagram. Yeah, chuck it to the Instagram. Podcast. Instagram, yeah, which is sex, love, everything in between, yeah.

Jacob O'Neill:

Maybe we should create a little questionnaire box that we can put on. We'll do that down the track as well. Little question box in the show notes you want to submit a question, submit a question, cool, like a tight form or something like that.

Meg O'Neill:

That would be really great. But for now, just you can DM us at the podcast, Instagram and anything else you want to add.

Jacob O'Neill:

Have a beautiful, beautiful day or evening, wherever you're at. And yeah, just super grateful. This is we're coming close to the 100th episode. So yeah, we are.

Meg O'Neill:

I think we're at this is probably the 86 or 87

Jacob O'Neill:

maybe we'll live stream the birth as the 100th episode. I haven't run that by Meg yet, but perfect. How good would that be? Having everyone watch you give birth, having just 1000 1000 sets of eyes in the room

Meg O'Neill:

that was feels so safe, so beautiful, and just let me lead. I'm

Jacob O'Neill:

gonna put a little grandstand outside the door, like

Meg O'Neill:

we are giving birth in like our front room of our house. And if we did open the curtains, it would be a show. It

Jacob O'Neill:

would be a pretty cool thing to walk past. Whoa, wow. Look at the power of woman. And then are we squealing? Okay,

Meg O'Neill:

well, is it going to be a ticketed live just

Jacob O'Neill:

click on the Event price link down below, there's three tiers. Baby O'Neill's birth key be kept sacred. But, uh, yeah, really, yeah. Just want to honor the you guys showing up. And you know, we've run into people down the street, and we get messages all the time, and it's so great to hear how implementable some of the stuff we share on here is, and how real, real and transferable it is for you guys to take into your relationship. So, yeah, that's, that's a blessing, you know, that we don't, we do this, I think, you know, insert. Us to all relationships, but it's such a so it's so nice when we do receive those those compliments or those confirmations of what we're doing is is making a difference. So thank you. So

Meg O'Neill:

yeah, my favorite thing is when someone just like randomly, is like, Hey, I listened to your podcast. I'm like, Oh, hello. So fun, because we do just sit in our lounge room looking at each other and having a chat, and then our team sends it out to all the platforms. So sometimes it is, it's well not sometimes it is always beautiful to know who is listening and to meet people who are listening. So if you ever see us in the flesh, please let us know you're a podcast listener.

Jacob O'Neill:

Please do alrighty. We love you. Bless up. See, love. Yo, yo, yo. Thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of sex, love and everything in between. Now, if you'd like to stay connected with Meg and I, you can head on over to Instagram and follow me at the Jacob O'Neal and where can people find you lover

Meg O'Neill:

at the dot. Meg, dot. O

Jacob O'Neill:

amazing. And yeah, guys, check out the show notes for all other information in regards to what we've got coming up. And yeah, we're super, super grateful that you guys for taking the time to listen in to this podcast. If you do have any topics or any questions like I said, hit us up on Instagram and we'll see what we can do. Apart from that, have a beautiful, beautiful rest of your day.

Meg O'Neill:

Thanks for being here.

Jacob O'Neill:

Big, big. Love you.

People on this episode

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Jacob O'Neill

Host
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Meg O'Neill

Host