Have you ever wished for a little more romance in your life? We've got your back! We're chatting about how to sprinkle some extra love into your relationship and make your partner feel extra special.
We also share a touching dialogue about the power of 'acts of significance'—a love language that speaks volumes through the simple, everyday acts of care and support. Meg and Jacob will be talking about uncovering and fulfilling those deep desires for more romance and receive more moments that will sweep your partner off their feet.
We also riff of on:
and many, many more...
⚡ If you loved this episode & the podcast, make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss anything.
AND… it would mean the world to us if you rated & reviewed the show.
We carefully read each and every review, and we love hearing about your experience with the podcast!
⚡️Let’s Stay Connected:
IG: @the.meg.o @thejacoboneill @sexloveeverythinginbetween
⚡ Want more? Here are some of the offerings & courses you can join us in…
The Desire Date: A sexy date night experience for couples ready to re-ignite passion & deepen intimacy. ---> https://bit.ly/49r28Zt
Ignite Your Intimacy: A 4 week course for couples ready for a sexier, wilder, more ALIVE relationship… NOW! ---> https://bit.ly/3R0ihxU
Intimacy Immersion: An in-person one-day immersion on the Gold Coast for couples desiring to ignite their intimacy & deepen in love. --> https://www.meg-oneill.com/intimacy-immersion
⚡Join us for our Podcast Live Event!
Register here: --> https://www.meg-oneill.com/SEX-LOVE-EVERYTHINGINBETWEEN
Saturday 2nd March @ 5pm - 9pm |Mylky Space, Gold Coast
Jacob & Meg also coach individuals & couples. Reach out to them via Instagram for more information.
Have you ever wished for a little more romance in your life? We've got your back! We're chatting about how to sprinkle some extra love into your relationship and make your partner feel extra special.
We also share a touching dialogue about the power of 'acts of significance'—a love language that speaks volumes through the simple, everyday acts of care and support. Meg and Jacob will be talking about uncovering and fulfilling those deep desires for more romance and receive more moments that will sweep your partner off their feet.
We also riff of on:
and many, many more...
⚡ If you loved this episode & the podcast, make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss anything.
AND… it would mean the world to us if you rated & reviewed the show.
We carefully read each and every review, and we love hearing about your experience with the podcast!
⚡️Let’s Stay Connected:
IG: @the.meg.o @thejacoboneill @sexloveeverythinginbetween
⚡ Want more? Here are some of the offerings & courses you can join us in…
The Desire Date: A sexy date night experience for couples ready to re-ignite passion & deepen intimacy. ---> https://bit.ly/49r28Zt
Ignite Your Intimacy: A 4 week course for couples ready for a sexier, wilder, more ALIVE relationship… NOW! ---> https://bit.ly/3R0ihxU
Intimacy Immersion: An in-person one-day immersion on the Gold Coast for couples desiring to ignite their intimacy & deepen in love. --> https://www.meg-oneill.com/intimacy-immersion
⚡Join us for our Podcast Live Event!
Register here: --> https://www.meg-oneill.com/SEX-LOVE-EVERYTHINGINBETWEEN
Saturday 2nd March @ 5pm - 9pm |Mylky Space, Gold Coast
Jacob & Meg also coach individuals & couples. Reach out to them via Instagram for more information.
I truly believe every single woman wants to feel significant. And I know that every single woman wants to feel like she's the only woman in the room. That That to me is I believe that is an important part of, especially if you're in a monogamous heterosexual relationship. I gotta make sure that I put it in the frame haha. But I truly believe that everyone wants to feel that like I agree. I totally believe that and I think it's, we do a disservice to relationships to try and play that part of a woman down or we try to say that that's not as important the joy
Meg O'Neill:the or the excitement that like it melts a woman. Yep, it melt it cracks a woman the fuck open when she feels when she feels significant. And that was just like the most beautiful moment Hi lovers, welcome to sex, love and everything in between the podcast. We are the O'Neill's. I'm Meg and I'm here with my husband, Jacob. And
Jacob O'Neill:the conversations we have here are real, raw, and very uncensored. They will change the way that you experienced sex, intimacy and relationships or ever.
Meg O'Neill:We are stoked you're here. Enjoy this Episode
Jacob O'Neill:Hey, lovers,
Meg O'Neill:welcome back, everyone.
Jacob O'Neill:Season two is here.
Meg O'Neill:And you're potentially watching us this season could be
Jacob O'Neill:seeing us on video right now
Meg O'Neill:on Spotify. And I think YouTube, Spotify and YouTube baby. So if you're only listening and you want to watch what the fuck are you doing?
Jacob O'Neill:I feel a little exposed to be honest. No,
Meg O'Neill:it's yeah,
Jacob O'Neill:I'm worried I'm going to pick my nose or scratch myself or do something inappropriate.
Meg O'Neill:And we have to look extra engage. Now when we're talking to each
Jacob O'Neill:other, and be shut I want to be shamed in the comments for doing something awkward or gross. So
Meg O'Neill:I've noticed I don't think I've ever seen him pick your nose every
Jacob O'Neill:now. Cyril nose picker really? Yeah.
Meg O'Neill:Why have I never. I think you've probably seen me pick my nose.
Jacob O'Neill:I see you do a lot of things.
Meg O'Neill:I'm, I'm a feral.
Jacob O'Neill:I would call you a bit of a grub would be I'd
Meg O'Neill:say that's a beautiful description of me.
Jacob O'Neill:A little grub up.
Meg O'Neill:Yeah. used to call me slug. I like that nickname you do? I don't know why you called me that. But I liked it.
Jacob O'Neill:It was because you were really slow and you left a trail of slop
Meg O'Neill:Well, we're stoked to be back. Everyone. We missed you for an entire week
Jacob O'Neill:that yeah, that threw me off to be honest. Having a week off.
Meg O'Neill:Really? Yeah,
Jacob O'Neill:this has been probably the only thing I've done consistently in the last year, I would say everything else has been up and down. But the podcast has been my my one thing that I've done. Hey, so we're back into some discipline, some discipline my life can can return to order now. I'm so excited about season two. Yeah. Season two feels feels like fresh energy. We can do a lot of good. A lot of guests lined up. We've got
Meg O'Neill:such killer guests lined up. You did some epic podcast interview this week. Yeah, they're doing some great ones in the next month. Month was amazing, man. Yeah, we've got all the men and some amazing women. But there's an incredible amount of men that were interviewing.
Jacob O'Neill:Yeah, I can't I'm really looking for I've had some great conversations and Bros. The last year I did two podcasts this week, bank them and then yeah, we've got a whole heap there. We've gone on bit of a bit of a trip up to the sunny coast to connecting with some other people. And it just feels it feels exciting that we get to bring in fresh energy. Because yeah, we've really spoken so much about ourselves and our experiences. And now it's like expanding those conversations out to hearing other people's stories as well.
Meg O'Neill:Are we running out of shit to say?
Jacob O'Neill:Oh, I don't want to say that I'm getting bored in this relationship. But
Meg O'Neill:well, that's a great segue into today's topic getting
Jacob O'Neill:a bit stagnant and we're just going through the motions. A segue, segue. So say today, we've had a little more like housemates than lovers. Segway actually quite like being filmed to be honest. You
Meg O'Neill:look. You look directly at the camera. I'm just making eye contact with you. But anyway, let's let's move on. So it is Valentine's Day very fucking soon on time. By the time this episode comes out, Valentine's Day is probably like five days away. But this is for Valentine's Day. But also this isn't just exclusively for this one day of the year. What we're going to talk about is really applicable to entire relationships, especially long term relationships. And we're really talking about how to ignite romance in your relationship. Specifically got a question for From a woman asking, I want more romance, how do I invite my partner to be more romantic? So we're gonna be diving into that. But we also just wanted to have a deeper conversation around romance, acts of significance, really making your partner feel special and why that's fucking important. Again, especially in a long term relationship.
Jacob O'Neill:I think it's great to see it from both points of view as well. Like what like, what's the actual first for sometimes, like, for me, as a man, it's like, well, what's the point? You know, I'm doing all the other things. So what do I need to do this? What's the what's what am What am I? What am I actually doing this for, and actually has a really important place in regards to like passion and aliveness and the feeling of like, I would say, like fierce wild love, it's what keeps the fire burning. For me anyway, that's what I've noticed. It's keeps the newness and the sense of adventure and spontaneity. And that is like such an important thing, especially the longer that you relate with someone, it can become really easy to fall into the status quo fall into just a rhythm of just doing the bare minimum, completely.
Meg O'Neill:I was having a conversation with a beautiful client of mine this week, actually. And we were talking about, you know, you are a man, that is an acts of service man and her partner ways as well. And we were talking about how grateful we are for being with men like that, being with men that you know, cook us food and make sure it makes life make our lives easier every day and make sure we have you know, things in order and support, buy the groceries and just like support us in so many things. Like in our waking life.
Jacob O'Neill:I'm not just that little house husband in the kitchen.
Meg O'Neill:Or I'm not your like nominal and and you're not and it's not as if I do nothing. I think sometimes we like play that up here on the podcast that I'm just sitting around being like a let's gonna say passenger Princess, our friend sent me Did you see that reel going around recently, I think you actually sent me into when I got sent it by multiple other people. And it was like a man opening the passenger door and putting down a blanket and roses and chocolates and all these different things. And it was like passenger were like preparing the seat for my passenger princess. No multiple people go, this is you. This is Jacob doing this for you on a road trip. You don't ride trip, sometimes it's just 30 minutes to the beach.
Jacob O'Neill:I think acts of service is how I and love as a as a child as well. So I don't want to go down I'm not processing process, I've been told that we're adding tips and tricks. I'm not allowed to talk about myself. I am not going to talk about myself today. I promise I will not say anything about me. It's not about me today. It's not about me, guys. It's about her and what she was. No, but I think acts of service is something that I like it's a part of my identity. So I think that's why it can be feel really triggering for men, especially if you if you do do a lot of things that support your partner. And then there's this like, Well, what about the romance? What about the moment like what about these significant things that you can do throughout the year? It's like, well, aren't I doing enough already? And it's like, no, what you're doing is amazing. And this is actually going to influence the relationship for both of us, like you've, you know, certainly energy and resource into this in a healthy way. And knowing that it's not every single day, you have to do this. This is like the new this isn't the new minimum standard. You don't need to be like writing love songs and poetry and bouquets of flowers every single day. It's about creating these times throughout the year where you do something significant that is really steeped in intention and you preparing something that really is a grand a grand gesture. Yeah.
Meg O'Neill:And I want to circle back to that. Back to the event you went two years ago where that guy spoke about acts of significance. But I want to just take it back to what I was talking about before when my client and I this week we're talking about getting really distracted by you looking directly into the camera. I'm
Jacob O'Neill:talking to the Goddess Hi everyone.
Meg O'Neill:Yeah, my client and I talking about our like you and her persona, being these these men that the so incredible acts of service. And yet and there's a part of us that is so filled by that and fed by that. But there's almost a separate part of us that desires something different. And so we were talking about how to bring that desire for more romance, how to bring that desire to want to receive these like moments that sweep us off our feet without making a man feel like what he's doing every day isn't good enough. And we're really talking about how to communicate this in a way of like, it's almost like feeding different parts of us as a woman, like, there's the part of us that you make feel. So like, for me personally, you make me feel so safe to relax into my life every single day. But then when you spontaneously buy me flowers, or when you take me on a date, or you say, I'm with, I'm taking you away this weekend, or we're doing something on Friday, and I'm not going to tell you anything, like, that makes me motherfucking giddy. It's like, the teenage girl within me is just like, so giddy and so excited. And this part of me that, yeah, this like, wants to be swept off her feet. And, yeah, just think that's really important to speak into, because if we do as a woman have a desire for more romance, and we want to communicate that it's really important that we communicated in a way where we're really acknowledging and respecting all the value that our man is currently bringing us. That's I think that's really important. Yeah, because that is one of one of the man's deepest wounds in relationship, right? This comes up for you a lot. It's like, the a woman's greatest wind is often I'm too much. Yep. And a man's greatest winning relationship is often are not good enough. Yeah. And so I just wanted to bring that awareness in because I think it's important that yes, it's so beautiful as a woman to desire more romance and desire to be swept off our feet. And to really own that, as a woman, I think for probably a really big chunk of my 20s or a big chunk of our relationship. I pretended I didn't want that I thought that would be seen as like high maintenance. And now I love that I love asking for that. I love receiving that I love being a woman that knows. That is a really incredible sensation and experience to have. Definitely.
Jacob O'Neill:My great aunt Auntie Joan once said that every woman wants her big day. Every woman wants to wants to, you know, and I said, No, I promise you, John makes different. And I had to eat my words. And I remember after our wedding, after we did the numbers, and we worked out how much we spent. It was a three day event, three day festival. I was like, Ah,
Meg O'Neill:I didn't just want my big day.
Jacob O'Neill:Big Weekend, long weekend. And then I was like, like, like, Oh, that makes sense. Like women want to be celebrated. Women want to have like the, the like their beauty and what we love about them reflected back in these grand gestures. And I think there's been such a stigma around like the hopeless romantic, and it seems it's seen as like old school gender roles. You know, a man being chivalrous and doing these things is like, oh, no, we're all equal. Now. We're all you know, we're 5050 You know, I no longer have to do those things for you. Because we're equal. And there's been a bit of a, I would say, like, kind of a neutralization of the grand gestures. Number one, because men they don't want to make it seem as though women are less than women. I don't want to open a door for you. Because you're a woman you're empowered now. You're sovereign your independence, like I don't want to buy you flowers. I don't I don't want to do any of these things that make you think that I'm putting you below me or me being the, you know, the hero of the story. But the actual fact is that when you choose to actually embrace it, it brings passion alive. It brings a sense of like, like you said that giddiness, it brings the the it brings the love online.
Meg O'Neill:Can you speak about that event you went to where the man spoke about acts of significance, because I remember you coming home. And this was probably a real important point in time of our relationship, because it was just before I really came into my sexual awakening and probably came into the part of me that was like, I want that, like, I'm no longer going to, you know, pretend I don't have desires, I'm not going to dilute myself or try not to be high maintenance. So I think this was a really important thing that you brought from this event to.
Jacob O'Neill:Yeah, it was talking about how we can do, we can be men of service, when we show up every day and serve. We do the things that just need to be done, because we're men, and we have a duty to our family, our woman our life, and we do that. And that's called showing up and serving. So service is one thing but significance is another thing. And significance is something that is not expected of you. It's not an it's not not a baseline expectation. And this is the tricky bit because it's not a baseline expectation, but it is a deep yearning. It's a deep ache. It's a deep desire of every woman to be swept off her feet to be told, yes, we're going to do the thing. We're not just going to talk about it today, hey, we're going off in the car. We're going we're going to where we're going to that that place that we've been talking about going to or that you've been, you've been hinting that you will Gonna go here? Well guess what we're going. And the thing that I want to say about significance is that it has to be an investment of your time, energy and resource, it's gonna cost you, it's gonna cost you like something that means something to you. That's the piece that makes it significant. It's not about it being like it has to be above $1,000 longer than two days, and you have to be off your phone and fully present with her and do everything, have everything organized for those two days. It's about what is it an investment of your time, your energy and your resources that will have her feeling? Or will have you feeling like this is grand and have her feeling like Oh, my God, I can't believe he's done this. Yeah, that's, that's, that's what will create a significant experience. Oh, my God, I can't believe we're doing this. Oh, my God, this is Oh, my God, I can't believe he did this. So this might be if you're not a writer, this might be just literally writing a card. And instead of just writing Happy birthday, or Happy anniversary, you write down all the things that you love about your partner, and all the things that she did this year that you're really grateful for.
Meg O'Neill:I love that you've brought that up, because it's yeah, it's not necessarily, okay, you need to take three days off work and spend x amount of dollars, like you said, it's really, we want to feel,
Jacob O'Neill:yeah, that you sacrifice, you want to feel like
Meg O'Neill:it, whether it's your vulnerability and discomfort or whether it's money, whether it's time, but you and I love the definition of sacrifice being to make sacred Yeah, so it's almost like you sacrifice something to make us sacred to make the relationship sacred.
Jacob O'Neill:Totally. And like, for some men, it might be the $5,000 weekend away, that might be that might be their sacrifice. For another one, it might just be going out to a nice restaurant and spending 150 bucks for other people that might be buying that that dress that she wanted for or that you know that that top that she wanted for $50. It's like, it's not about the amount of money it's about what it is what it means for you to sacrifice that amount of money, or energy or time. So that's the that's the pace there. And it has to be significant. The way that makes it significant is that there is a sacrifice made from you on the behalf of the thing that you're offering.
Meg O'Neill:Yes, even an example of like time could be if you play on a golf every Saturday, and you say to your woman, and she just knows you play golf every single Saturday and you say to your woman this Saturday, I've canceled golf. I'm taking you somewhere special. Right? And she knows how much you motherfucking love golf. Yes. So you've had to sacrifice, you know, something you love. You've had to sacrifice. You know what you usually do on that Saturday morning and that feels to make her sacred to to give her that feeling of significance.
Jacob O'Neill:It's an amplified feeling of you prioritizing her, like holy, I'm Amen. I am the priority for this. This this this, like this Day this weekend this where he prioritized me he chose to do this. And yeah, that story that his name's Joe Panay. He's a he's a life coach from down in Melbourne. Such a cool guy, such a cool guy. I just did not expect to be as inspired. He's just He's, uh, I just remember looking at him, like, I don't get you. I'm like, You're weird looking. You wear a vest. You're wearing joggers and like, super. I'm like, like, you're, but he knew his shit. And I remember hearing him speak that story. I was like, yeah, he, he or he did the whole thing. He booked a beautiful hotel hotel in the middle of Melbourne. And he lives just outside of Melbourne. But he did this and invited his wife in after work. And he they could see the Louis Vuitton store from from where they were staying. And he, he walked in there and he's like, and he said, we're not just here to try today, my love. We're here to buy. And he'd already been in the day before and organized with the salesperson in there. So we went in and met let's just call him James for like, I can't remember when he's like He went and saw James and he said when I come in with my wife, I'm gonna say just gonna call her Danielle. I want you to I want you to come out and and and just completely and utterly just just adore adorn her in in your in your attention. Because whereby I want to buy her something. I want to make sure that she gets the best experience ever. So as they walked into the store, he said, Hey, we're not here to just try we're here to buy, as he said that. James came up and when Joe is this the woman who could not stop talking about yesterday Is this her She's more beautiful than you. Then you describe. Just came in and just like completely like everything and this is the thing. It's not he curated and this is it. He curated an experience that had her feeling like she was the only woman in the world. And that's what you do like when you To create a significant experience you, you, you, you, you create, you don't just create one thing you create a whole moving, shifting complex. And that's what that's what makes it vulnerable. fuck am I gonna pull this off? You know, I've done it so many times where I've been so fucking nervous because I'm like, I really hope this works. And sometimes it does sometimes.
Meg O'Neill:I want to jump in because I've just remembered this that when you went to that event and heard that story and learn about acts of significance, we were living with my parents. Yes. Do you remember my mom's birthday in the ring? My dad? Yeah. So we were talking about that accidentally, a significant and it was my mom's birthday coming up. Yes. And I don't know how. But maybe my dad came to me and was like, What should I get your mom? And because you and I had been talking about acts of significance. I was saying him. Go big. Yeah, get us something really fucking beautiful. And he was gonna get this small ring. And I convinced him to get this just like, beautiful. It was like an antique Diamond D ring. My mom is never somewhat my mom's not a showy person. She's not very materialistic. She would never she would never say she wants romance at all. No, she's someone that's just like, I'm not high maintenance. Like, I'm not high minded. I'm not. And I don't think my dad has ever really done a lot of romantic things. But my mom
Jacob O'Neill:he's the probably the most solid man. I know. He's very he's
Meg O'Neill:service my dad. Yeah, totally my dad's service but probably hasn't done a lot of signal a
Jacob O'Neill:lot of safety. But I would say yeah, significance wasn't wasn't a priority. And especially I don't know what it's like with three kids. But yeah, he he didn't prioritize significance. Totally.
Meg O'Neill:So we've really convinced him and my sisters were then in on it to get my mom this really beautiful ring. And usually my dad would get my mom like clothes or just like active way. Just like such standard things every single fucking year. My mom, it makes me want to cry. Like when my mom opened that gift. Oh my god. It was like her inner teenager came out. So if I can find it, and we could just see like, like you said before, and I think sometimes I don't like to make those super generalized. Every woman wants that. But seeing my mom in that moment. And before that moment, I would never have heard her say she's like, well, I don't need anything. I don't need anything. I don't need anything. But to see my dad do something significant for her. She the joy, the or the excitement that like it melts a woman. Yep, it melt. It cracks a woman the fuck open when she feels when she feels significant. And that was just like the most beautiful moment. And I'd totally forgotten until right now,
Jacob O'Neill:the Steven street healing sanctuary. That was Steven street healing
Meg O'Neill:so much healing happened in that house. God we will pull for that period of time.
Jacob O'Neill:I'm gonna create I'm gonna go with an absolute hate. I believe that every woman and I'm gonna I'm gonna do this make
Meg O'Neill:me nervous when it comes to J. Crew, guys, if you've got an issue, they've
Jacob O'Neill:comments below, as long as it's not about some of my body language. Don't Don't don't offend me. I truly believe every single woman wants to feel significant. And I know that every single woman wants to feel like she's the only woman in the room. That that that to me is I believe that is an important part of, especially if you're in a monogamous heterosexual relationship, we're going to make sure that I put it in the frame. But I truly believe that everyone wants to feel that like I agree. I totally believe that. And I think it's, we do a disservice to relationships to try and play that part of a woman down or we try to say that that's not as important. And
Meg O'Neill:I think, you know, this is a huge part of the work I do with women is we have been taught to disown that part of us we have been taught that it's not safe to be quote, unquote, high maintenance. Right? We've been scared we've been we've literally the world conditions, teenage girls, and then women to play it cool. Yeah, I don't have many desires. I'll do whatever you want. Like I'm not like all the other girls like we're literally trained to be cool. Which means pushing down on desires. And so I think a huge part of my work, especially in full spectrum woman is really teaching a woman how to own this part of her that really yearns to be swept off her fucking feet and yearns to be made to feel significant yearns for the spontaneous moments of romance. And I think when a woman stops making that wrong in herself and owns that, that actually then opens the door to receiving that 100% And then she can actually invite her man into doing that without this cycle resentment. Yeah. I think that was a huge part of our relationship. Do Yeah. And
Jacob O'Neill:on the other side like a man like we, we would hold back in this modern sort of landscape we'd hold back from doing grand gestures. Because number one, we don't want to fall flat on our face. If we if we if we show a grand gesture and we in you're like, Well, no, I don't and because you don't want it, but you want to play it cool. You don't fully receive it, then we're gonna be like, fuck did I do something wrong? Fuck was like, come on too strong fuck. And then all of a sudden I'm in my head. And I'm like, Well, I'm not going to try that again. I'm just going to play it safe. I'm going to do the things that are gonna make sure that this relationship is secure. And I don't think that yeah, I I've noticed that in so many men is like, Guys are indifferent. They're like, you know, it's I like having a partner and it makes sense. And you know, I like doing things for her. But like, there isn't this passion. And if she was to leave, I'd be sad, but I wouldn't really. There's not there's not a lot there. And guys, like I love her. I do anything for her. But there isn't this aliveness or this depth of feeling created through these moments that crack open the container that actually fractured and make it even more alive.
Meg O'Neill:And would you say would you say if a man begins to practice this significance, not just service but ups the ante on significance that can actually support a woman to open totally, and in her own posture in her own transmission in the relationship that is more aliveness? There is more connection there is yeah, there is more openness. 100% just like my my mom, like seeing the a lot like my mom literally melted when she got that ring, and it wasn't about the ring. It was about my dad getting her something different than getting her something significant taking
Jacob O'Neill:a risk. Yes, that is significant is it's risky. That is so it was fucking hilarious. Your mom like you'd catch her and she'd just be like looking at it.
Meg O'Neill:And for weeks, she would just be like, I still, Michael, I still cannot believe you did this. For me. One
Jacob O'Neill:of the things that Joe said to me is like significant just because you've done one significant thing doesn't mean that you're good for the rest of the relationship as well. So this is an important thing. Like, if you are going to weave this into your relationship, and I highly recommend you do is that you work out a bit of a cycle. Were you actively leaning into significant experiences for your partner? So just to give you some structure, and I wasn't I was gonna just tell stories and have processes on in spite of you. But I'm actually going to come rally and actually add value to the listeners add a lot of value. And I've been a bit sassy on this one. What's up? Got a sore shoulder? You're actually Yeah. Didn't want to say anything that I just did. It's not about me, I was giving the structure so if you're a man like if you and your thing fuck when do I do significance? How do I know when the right time is one? When is it? How is it? What do I do every day of the fucking way every single day. Significance 365 75 significant. That's what you do. 75 hearts out. We're doing 75 significant. But if you look across the year, you've got Valentine's Day, you've got your anniversary. You've got your partner's birthday. So you've got these you've got it you've got a few already in the in the calendar. And then it's great to have one or two cheeky cheeky one ones that you can just pull out of nowhere. Yeah. So you've got you've already got a structure that's there for you to practice this on, like a larger scale. And this is something that I realized I was like, Ah, I want to make you feel significant. So let me start to explore what I can do and start to gather intel and data about what would actually be significant for you. And for me to to deliver. And what's one thing that you absolutely love. Cards. Yes cards.
Meg O'Neill:I love cards, guys, if you ever get me a present, please write a card. If
Jacob O'Neill:you ever get me present, a present will do. Thank you.
Meg O'Neill:I love cards. I love cards because of what it means like that person's had to go out, buy the card, sit down grab a pen, think about what I mean to them and express that words of affirmation gal you are a love language girl. I am a words of affirmation DL I'm all of them on all
Jacob O'Neill:of them. And that's one of the that's
Meg O'Neill:that's really significant to me and time like you've written something for me or Yeah, that's that's really significant for me.
Jacob O'Neill:It's also the time it takes to formulate how I'm feeling you know when what you actually mean like, it's not just like, do make happy birthday. I love you so much. Jacob it's like If I want to actually take my time to work out what, what is this card? Going to go into me? What can this card actually carry? And that's like, that's a significant matter how often like you said, I've got to sit down and over the years I've gotten better and better at that. I would say, yeah. I sometimes have forgotten cards, one on one or two occasions. I don't think you do a lot now. No, no, no. But I know that I've do remember, I've forgotten them how it like, it was definitely there was Yeah.
Meg O'Neill:Well, you're gonna go somewhere. Next. No. I don't even know if this leads another conversation Well, but I was just thinking about flowers and how, if you're a man listening to this, just go out and buy your woman flowers on a random day, take them home and say these are for you. And when she says, Why, just say I thought of you. Yeah. And just when I thought it's like, watch what happens. Watch what happens to her body. Watch what happens. And once I feel like once as a man you experience what it is like to make your woman feel significant, especially out of the blue, especially when there hasn't been an expectation, you will want to continue to, to love on her like that. You will want to continue to love on her like that. I really love Sorry, I just want to talk about this real I saw the other day. And it was this, this guy like going up to couples in the street or in random places. And he'll just put a red rose in the man's hand and walk away. And then the man will just like, obviously just give it to his partner. And all the women's faces like Like, they're just like, so surprised and so excited and so happy. And I just, I just loved it so much. Because I again, I just think of like, how simple it is to bring a woman into herself and bring a woman into her body and bring a woman into a place of just like joy and awe and appreciation.
Jacob O'Neill:I remember my sister who she's a budding florist, she put up a poster, she's like, I don't want you to buy me flowers. I want you to want to buy me flowers. Yeah. Which is like it's never about the thing. It's about the intention behind it. And like you said, those flowers, handing them handing them like, like you don't message you don't I'm on my way home just to let you know, I've got you got you flowers, you don't just you know, it's not something I got the milk and bread, but I and I got you a bunch of flowers, look out and bring them home to you. It's no it's it's it's in the sponsor, it's in the surprise, it's in the walk, I couldn't walk past it. So they just saw them. And they just reminded I just thought of you and I had to bring them home. And that the thing is they're don't just start to do that every Friday and say that, you know, say the same one liner, you can't just keep on trying to do the same thing in the same way and create a secret formula. No, it's about the is about the pulse, the impulse and the the passion. So it's not about just like creating this routine, because then it becomes dry becomes formulated, it becomes expected it becomes a routine, it loses its significance, right. So yeah, when when the urge to buy flow, like, like, I would say, at least once every once at least once every two months, buy flowers, if not once every month, and it's not about bringing them home on a specific day. But it's about ah, I saw some flowers and I thought of you bring. And
Meg O'Neill:I thought of you and this is the piece again, it's not just about the flowers. It's we as women want to know that you're thinking about us when you're not in our presence. Yeah. And, you know, this is something we've had many conversations around that. There's moments where I'm there's been moments earlier on in our relationship where I've questioned if you've been thinking about me, and you've been thinking about our relationship, and you have expressed in those moments, of course, like oh my gosh, you've been you. I've got a 10 year vision for us. I've got a 20 year vision for us. But you weren't really bringing that to the space. And I think this can be a really common thing for men that as women, we're a lot more verbally expressive. And so this act of significance or this act of buying flowers, or whatever it is, when you offer that to a woman really what that's indicating, is like hey, I was I was thinking of you even when I'm not with you, You're important to me, I think of you as I'm going to work I think of you as I'm moving through my day. And I think of you as this beautiful thing I want to shower and adorned with gifts. It
Jacob O'Neill:really like deeper, like a deeper kind of statement to that I'm hearing like I'm choosing you. Yeah, more than anyone else. And it's like, the thing about this is doing this for your partner. You don't just do this for anyone else either. That's the that's the beauty of it. And that's part of being in a monogamous relationship is like hey, you're the you're the one that I'm choosing I'm going to show I'm going to reflect that with some significant moments, some gestures that reflect that, hey, I'm choosing you more than anyone else. I don't, no one else gets this kind of treatment because you are mine. You're My Woman, and I want you to know that. I think that's a really beautiful gift,
Meg O'Neill:too. Two things. What would you say to a man that maybe knows his partner wants more romance? Or is listening to this and kind of rolling his eyes at like, what like, wow, God, why'd when Why is the more being asked of me? What would you say to that man?
Jacob O'Neill:Time to grow up or grow up? A bit. Now, I think it's, I think it's real or that frustration is real. And what I would say to that is, like, there's a part of you that wants to be acknowledged, for what you're already doing, I get that, most of the time, it's like, I know that you're already doing a lot. If you are an active service guy, or if you have been working really hard to provide, I totally get that. And I also want you to know that this is the thing that's gonna like, deepen and have you more nourished. This is the thing that will take you in givingness, you will by default, nothing goes one way in, in the name of love. So if you choose to step it up, and do something significant, it is going to create an experience where you get to almost have had that come back to you. Not not by expectation, but by like, the thing that you're seeking comes through giving in a way that you've never given before.
Meg O'Neill:Amen. And
Jacob O'Neill:I want you to know, like, that's not about it's not like, Oh, if I buy flowers, she's gonna stuff my deck, or if I buy flowers, she's gonna do this. It's not about creating this tit for tat. It's like, if I choose love, beyond what is beyond what makes sense, then I am opening myself to receiving something beyond what I could ever imagine. So it's a really subtle difference. I want you to know, this isn't this isn't mine driven, this kind of love. It's, it's a, it's an embodied gesture. So it's like I'm giving, I'm putting a part of me on the line for you to show you how much I care.
Meg O'Neill:And the woman, the woman that's nourished in this way, and feel significant in this way is a completely different woman to love. When this part of a woman is being fed. She loves differently. She's
Jacob O'Neill:like, she's more giddy, she's getting, she's gonna,
Meg O'Neill:she's gonna Oh my god, if you ever love to get a woman, it is a joy to be in the fucking joy to be a giddy woman. But the it's almost like this fizzy effervescence of a woman that you unlock when, when you offer her something like this. And especially, you know, a lot of women are walking around, say walking around hard. It kind of is like that, right? There's like, we have these hot and shells the world teach us to operate from and, you know, a lot of the time men crave a nourishing woman, a woman that is going to feel nourishing to the nervous system. And we as women want to be that for our men. But sometimes we don't know how to get to that place. And as a man, you're part of the ecosystem that supports us as women to nourish you. Your behavior affects our nervous system, which then affects the way we show up in love and nourish you. And so this this is one of the ways in which you can evoke our nourishment, you can evoke our giddiness you can evoke our open heartedness totally My other question was for the woman that's like fuck yeah, to all of this. I want acts of significance. Gimme gimme, gimme, I want to I want to be treated in this way. I want to experience this. How do I invite my man to offer me this? What would you say?
Jacob O'Neill:I don't normally suggest like a compliment sandwich. But I think that that's kind of the the approach of like, actually, like Shug actually, like acknowledging all that he already does. I mean, coming to coming in and just like, actually, let me fucking let this man know. Hey, thank you. Thank you for this. Thank you for that. Like actually go ahead and like make a list and let him know how much you appreciate that. And not in the same breath and just flip it into like, okay, now I want this. You created create some time and trust the trust, the timing will be right. But my suggestion would be like, yeah, just like firstly, acknowledge him and honor him. And then when the time is right, like bring through this invitation, and like I would love I would love to really deepen our relationship. And part of that would be like, I want to feel like the only girl in the world. I want to feel like there's no one else in the room. I want to feel like I want to feel really fucking Special. And I know and like I know, I know last week for and acknowledging like the fullness of the model but but I still really feel like I want to be I want to be, I want to be adorned I want to be I want to be, I want to be taken out I want to be I want to be sell celebrated. Not put on show us like, I want to feel your I want to feel your love in a way that I've never felt before.
Meg O'Neill:I love that. Yeah, my client and I this week, we're talking about like, yeah, that almost in a teenager and us that once upon a time to stand outside our room with a boombox and like declare His love every breath, you and I but I think this can be a really playful way to bring it be like, Hey, there's this part of me that wants you to do something. So cringy is so like it is so cringy really romantic. And, and you can even because I know a lot of women would almost feel embarrassed to have that desire. And you can bring that you can roll all of that up in one and bring that to your partner. We always say this here, like vulnerability creates deep intimacy. And when you have a desire, please bring it with your vulnerability because that opens your partner in a way that nothing else can. So you know, saying like, you know, this is part of me, and I always feel embarrassed to say it, but I like really want you to do something so cringy and so romantic. Like think rom com like 90s, early 2000s rom com, then it can be like, Could you do something like that for me in the next month.
Jacob O'Neill:And that's the end, I get the invitation, it has to come in a really gentle softing it has to come from the part of you that you want to activate. Yeah, so if you come in hardened and you like, we never go out.
Meg O'Neill:You never like walk in this person on Instagram. Look at the way he proposed. You never do.
Jacob O'Neill:We never do any of this anymore. We used to this, we don't do it anymore. It's like if you come hardened, it's gonna feel as though he's not enough. And he's not going to feel as though he's not going to feel inspiration to to bring that into the religion. But if you come soft and gooey like and there's a part of you that like probably doesn't want to admit that you want the cringy rom com kind of love it's it's it's like no, I'm a New Age woman that can look after herself and I'm fiercely independent, and then yada yada, yada. Cool, but the truth is like you do want to access this part of you that you have been denying. And I think every like I said every woman wants that and it's almost like the ability to just be like listen this is cringy but I want to be like I want to feel like a princess for that for a day. And
Meg O'Neill:I think that is a vulnerability that many women aren't willing to bring to their relationship with that's actually what they want to feel
Jacob O'Neill:correct and so I just want to say this you're choosing to do this consciously This isn't Yeah, like playing the damsel in distress playing into some bullshit codependency This is conscious. This is why you know in David data's work where his third stage relating is called intimate communion. And codependency is first stage relating, they can look exactly the fucking same but where they're coming from is different, which is what we're talking about when we make sense saying, the feeling. It's the fucking feeling. Yeah,
Meg O'Neill:and when you realize I want to feel I want to play in that like, oh my gosh, I'm being like, you know, swept off my feet. I feel like a Disney princess. It's not thinking that that's all a woman is no fucking way. But as a woman, there's a part of you that wants to know what it's like to be that it wants to know what it's like to have that sensation, that experience and this is what I truly mean by being a full spectrum woman it's a woman that that allows herself to have this full spectrum experience without making it mean anything about her womanhood about not without making it mean something wrong about her because she wants that thing.
Jacob O'Neill:Yeah 100%
Meg O'Neill:I want to kind of shift gears a little in a moment but anything else you want to share around romancing a woman and making a woman feel significant?
Jacob O'Neill:I think like the thread of like chivalry like I think it's it's it as a man, you get to own that as well. You get to own the chivalrous. I will I will do significant things for you. And I don't care if you try to play it down. Or if there is like this idea of like, you don't need it. I don't care. I'm gonna give it to you anyway. I think there's something so attractive about a man that says, Oh, I don't care. I'm buying the flowers anyway, like odd flowers or, you know, my granny's quite funny like this, you know, she, she loves He loves things, but she doesn't see the value in them because of the money. But when she gets it, she'll she'll run around like a headless chuck with it. She loves it and even if your partner's saying they don't need it, and you're aware of it, like if you're the man becoming aware of this first and your partner isn't aware and inviting you into it. If you bring the flowers home, if she's like, Ah, he don't need to do, I'm like, I don't care if I don't need to, I'm gonna do it anyway, because I love you. And I thought of you. And these are beautiful flowers, and they're yours now. And there's a way for you to, like, stand in that. And it's like, if you open the door for a woman, and you know, who gives a fuck, open it, like, just do it. I think there's like a real I'd love to, I'm gonna put a post out about this. If I want to hold the fucking door for you, I will if I want to, if I want to come and help you lift something heavy, I fucking will. If I want to be a man, I'll fucking Be a man. You know, take it up with someone else. I'm not going to apologize for wanting to, to do these acts. And that's the same thing when we amplify is like, I want to take you away. Oh, should we go? Too bad we're going.
Meg O'Neill:I love when you hold strong with me and those things. It's really like, especially when you when you're talking about the flowers, like for many women, many women aren't comfortable receiving. So even though there's a depth of a woman that so deeply wants that. If a man is bringing her home flowers, and this is a new experience for her, she's not necessarily going to feel familiar or comfortable in that experience, immediately there's going to be a push back, there's going to be a part of her that goes. He's still scary. What the fuck? Like, why did he do this? And like, why did you spend that money? I don't need that. And it is so fucking sexy. For a man not to take that personally and to hold that. And like you said, it's like, I know, I didn't need to buy the flowers. I wanted to buy the flowers. I bought the flowers. Yes. And that's just so sexy. That is what that holding. And that unwavering is. When a woman is unable to fully receive in that moment, that is what supports a woman's nervous system to be able to receive and find the posture of receiving, oh, even today, I wasn't feeling very well and you put on toast for me. And then the toast pop didn't need to do put down again. I was like, Okay, I'll do it. And I walked over to the toaster to do it and you like jumped over the counter and popped it. If I'm gonna do I will do it.
Jacob O'Neill:You said it's time to shift gears. Well,
Meg O'Neill:I want to talk about men. And maybe I wanted to talk about romance. And maybe not romantic a man but like, I want to also talk about making a man feel valued and special. And because I adore like birthdays, when when you have things that are really important to you in your life. When there's a big moment in in your life. I love honoring that. And I love celebrating it with that. And I just think it's I don't want to just leave this episode being like men, it's your duty to make a woman feel significant. I also want to have the conversation around. It's our duty as a woman who's devoted to loving a man really well to consistently make him feel valued. Yep. And reflect his value to him. Before
Jacob O'Neill:we go there. Is there examples that you want to give like significance? Like yeah, that's, that's important because and what I would say is that every woman is is the same but different. Like every woman, like there's there are common threads like you wait, we talked about the flowers, there's things that reflect back her beauty. And then like she wants to feel like I would say things that amplify pleasure and passion. Men probably aren't as Yeah, totally, you said is what I'm saying the same but different. It's like, but then the difference is that you're with a unique woman. She's one of a kind. So what you must do is you must become really, really aware of her words of her body language of things that she's showing you. And you start to gather intel and then you can create an experience. So for you, I know you like nice hotels, not motels. And it's like after your birthday, we go away to a nice hotel, we go out to a nice dinner, we do an activity that you don't expect sometimes that goes well sometimes that doesn't go well. But it normally results in like hearts cracked open. Yeah. Or I, you know, I learned about like I can what brand of jewelry Do you like? And like every woman has her, her her unique desires. And when you become more and more aware of those, you can start to orchestrate these significant experiences for them. But for me, like there's nothing like a hey, you're free on the 30th Yep. Cool. All right.
Meg O'Neill:I love that so much.
Jacob O'Neill:I've just sent you a calendar invite for two days, but he blocked out. We're going away. There
Meg O'Neill:is like no and I was not like this at the beginning. Not at all. But this is this isn't one of my favorite feelings, especially as a woman that I run my own business. I have a lot of responsibility in business. I make a lot of decisions. Every day, now I lead a team. You know, I'm, I have to play that decision maker a lot in my life. And so when you offer me the container in which I do not have to make decisions for days, by going, hey, you know, take those two days off we're doing when we're going away. And I'll often say, I know you're never going to tell me but I just like to play and go, Where are we going? Yeah, like, you don't need to know that. You don't need to know that you were there.
Jacob O'Neill:And if you understand someone's love, like love, like, it's the love, love languages are a good thing to know. Like, for Meg, one of her greatest. She loves all of them as we've established. It's a little bit of a joke, but it's not. And but the one that you really, really love is quality time.
Meg O'Neill:So what already time number one,
Jacob O'Neill:what I'm saying is affirmation. Number two, what I'm saying. Physical touches, number three, acts of service gifts. Yeah. So for me to buy you really expensive jewelry would not have the same effect as saying we're going away for two days, because you know that if we're going away for two days, you've got me all to yourself.
Meg O'Neill:And for me, there's part of me that's like, I could buy myself jewelry. I can't give myself that level of surrender that you facilitate by taking control of my life for two days, totally. And making all the decisions for me. And I know some women listening would be like, Oh, I remember you said this on our training. We were doing relationships. And you were like, imagine your man saying, Okay, pack your bags, or like I'm packing your bags. I
Jacob O'Neill:was like, walking them into it. I was like, okay, he has organized where you guys are going? They're like, Yeah, cool. Yeah. Yeah, we so he's organizing where we stay or where we go and organize the destination and the accommodation.
Meg O'Neill:Okay, okay. I think you get it, right. But as
Jacob O'Neill:he got his breakfast, and then I was like, Okay, and what is going to happen is he's going to pick you up from work, and he's going to pack your bag for you. He's just going to arrive at the front of work, and he's already packed your bag, all you have to do is hop in the passenger seat. They're like, No, no, we'll pack our bags, but definitely he can book the accommodation. And it's like,
Meg O'Neill:no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And I think the packing of the bag, that's such a personal thing.
Jacob O'Neill:That's what Yeah, it's like, it's like, oh, like, say like, you are open to like having like having an act of service done for you. It's just like, yes. So like, it's like, oh, no, yeah, he can definitely book The accommodation. But I would definitely want to pack my bag. It's like cool, like, a big part of significant moments for a woman is letting go of control huge, and it's taken you a few years to get used to
Meg O'Neill:being used for accommodation, and we would arrive and I would you were just amazed that you would be so rude. I would be so very Yeah. And it was like this subconscious thing that it wasn't as if we pulled up and I was like, I'm gonna I'm gonna criticize him. He was like the part of me that wanted that roll back the part of me that didn't feel safe in you playing that role for me.
Jacob O'Neill:And if I was bad at it meant that it was more, it made more sense for you to do it
Meg O'Neill:for me to take it back. And so that would be the part of me that was like looking like hypercritical looking for is the aircon working is look at the sheets or like, oh, like look, it's on in this position or I would have put something closer to the water like there was this hypercritical part of me that was trying to find where you fucked up. So I could so I could rationalize going. It's not safe to fully like let him take the lead. I'll book The accommodation from now on.
Jacob O'Neill:And and I think it's important as a woman if you do want more of this, you've got to let the man explore what it's like to do different types of significant things. Yeah, you know, I remember when we went down stay down at Pottsville in that horrible horrible small motel and what happened it was one of the
Meg O'Neill:i loved it i don't think i was critical No no that's awful guys.
Jacob O'Neill:It was the worst it was it was uncomfortable. It was hot it was fucking it was this like bargain caravan park it was actually used to be a brothel apparently used to be where they would Yeah,
Meg O'Neill:but we had such a beautiful
Jacob O'Neill:thing like the I looked after I organized a great weekend away and we didn't let the form ruin the feeling. Yes, and this is the piece like if your man's willing to step the fuck up do something that he's never done before and created an experience and immersive experience. Where the whole point of it is for you to feel significant for you to feel like you can relax and and receive then your job is to focus on the feeling.
Meg O'Neill:I always say this about like honoring the riskiness it takes and the courage it takes for a man to do acts of significance or do do something super romantic. There's always risk in that because is romantic things by nature or acts of significance by nature are things that you're not expecting or things that it's the risk that when it lands is why it feels so good as a woman. And so I think we really need to acknowledge the riskiness that our partner is all the risks our partner willing to take to do something like that. Yeah. And you spoke about indifference in men before. And I think that's the biggest thing that holds men back from doing that. It's kind of like this fear of just like, why the fuck would I risk that? Why the fuck would I risk not getting it right? Or, like, let's just stay where we are.
Jacob O'Neill:And it's fine. Everything's fine.
Meg O'Neill:And that's what I love about you. And God, we've told some stories here on the podcast, but you are so fucking willing to take a risk. And sometimes those risks do not land they always end with me being cracked, open, enjoy and love and tears. But sometimes the actual moment, like my birthday with the surprise ocean canoe trip, had me almost having a panic attack.
Jacob O'Neill:So you're not always going to get it right. But it's in the it's in the commitment and to the feeling. And that's from both sides, right? Yeah. If you get to the motel, and you wanted a hotel, and you look, and you see that and you look like I hope that your posture is well that that aircon better work because oh, god this room small are these sheets, if you're in that posture of like, this? Isn't? doesn't look right, and I need to change it.
Meg O'Neill:And he didn't get it right. He didn't get it right. The undertone of the hypercritical. Yeah, he didn't get it, right. And there's part of me that has a kink for making sure he doesn't get it right. And that doesn't want to drop.
Jacob O'Neill:And that's like sinking into can you sink into like I my man's taking me away. And like I said, like a man, it needs to be risky, it needs to be a sacrifice. But you don't want to be in a position where you're constantly living outside your means just to do something extravagant. Like this is significant. It doesn't need to be extravaganza. So if if that's a you know if it is a weekend at the Carlyle for your partner, and it cost you 1500 bucks for the accommodation, if that's in your if that's if that's like in your significant budget. Awesome. But if it's not, that doesn't make you any, that doesn't mean that you can't still do significant things for your partner.
Meg O'Neill:I remember even when we didn't really have a lot of money one day you taught you took me down to Karim and rockpools. And you'd packed a picnic and messes and like you sent out a picnic there and like this stuff significance does not have to cost money time potentially. Yeah, right. But but it does not have to cost money at all. Like this is where you can get so creative.
Jacob O'Neill:Definitely. And just to finish up before we switch over is like you women are all the same but different. So women wants that. I'm saying that because I think it's important to know that all women want to feel significant. But you're with someone who is uniquely them uniquely themselves. And your job as the man is to bring your awareness into let me understand this woman on a deep enough level. So the risk that I'm taking doesn't feel as risky. So it's like love that. So it's like cool up. Mag loves Byron Bay. Okay, cool. So if I booked something in Byron Bay, I'm in a pretty that I'm gonna have a pretty good success right in. That's that will feel good. Yeah. But if I booked somewhere at Ballena probably not. So it's like if you're gathering intel gathering data and you're finding these things out about your partner and understanding her on a deeper level, just by being more aware, not by saying if I was going to do something significant would Byron Bay for two nights be good at this place?
Meg O'Neill:That is that that okay, we need to speak about that because you asking questions about the act of significance you can do ruins the act of Yeah, it kind of deflates the whole so it's like the Louis Vuitton store you told if that man was constantly going like, hey Dee, do you have time? Like do you like or is it like Gucci let go I don't know if that was like this. You know, this this almost for me that doesn't show a trust in a man there's less of a risk then. So this is really about backing yourself as
Jacob O'Neill:well. And that the classic thing that I work with a lot of guys that have the people pleaser archetype quite strong. They're like, I just need her to tell me what she wants so I can give it to her brown brown, you've just you've just lost the the essence of of what makes the thing the thing which is too risky, which is to like, learn these things. Yeah, about your woman and then deepen in to giving it to her without fear.
Meg O'Neill:And I think that I just want to bring in a PC that I think an edge for many, many, many, many, many women is to speak more of their desires to the relationship. But I think we're specifically speaking about acts of significance here which, yeah,
Jacob O'Neill:don't just go to the shops and just be like, Ah, I'll just get or whatever it's like she actually likes this. You know, I know which brand of moisturizer you like, because you've told me I know which toothpaste you have. Because you've told me it's not about I'm going to I'm going to get a licorice flavored toothpaste. She will be so surprised like that. That will feel I
Meg O'Neill:feel like just one more piece here is that I love any gifts or significant things that you've done for me. I love having the feeling of like, oh, he listened. Yes. Oh, he listened I didn't
Jacob O'Neill:know that he was he listened then like I didn't know that he didn't even he didn't even say anything.
Meg O'Neill:So that and that's actually one of my favorite things to give as well. I love like hearing and kind of tracking what you're into and then wanting to give you something that you would be like oh my god, you listened and I feel so like, you know me. I really love offering you that feeling of like, oh, you know me?
Jacob O'Neill:Definitely. Even on anniversary when I bought you the like I went bought you the jewelry. I think it was like, I would never I've never I've never been one to buy you a lot of jewelry. You've never worn a lot of jewelry until probably the last couple of years. But then I was like, I want to buy you something like this is significant. Like it feels like I want to I want you to feel like I want you to feel a sense of surprise. We had a great weekend away. But I bought you that snake necklace and then I bought you the what do you call that thing? Cough cough and I remember being I remember you being like, a little bit like, Oh, I didn't know you're getting me this. Oh, this is a surprise. And I was like yeah, I want to do that. I want to join you in gold. I want you to know that this is like You're My Woman like it's been a year since you know I've said yes to fucking forever with you. Like let's remember this every year let's let's not hide from the significance that is our love. And that is you.
Meg O'Neill:And what did I get you? T shirt. Kind of decent.
Jacob O'Neill:You got a t shirt with you all over it. Wi Fi. I should have worn it for the podcast,
Meg O'Neill:you should know you'll have to wear Jacob a t shirt that said Wi Fi with like all of these photos of being over it. I actually fucking loved
Jacob O'Neill:saints that so many times on Instagram, the ads,
Meg O'Neill:I was so nervous to give you that because I was like you're very particular about things and this is why I knew it was going to potentially be the greatest president ever. Because I felt so nervous giving that I was like he's either gonna hate this and think this is the craziest thing or he's gonna love it and potentially still think it's the craziest thing it was
Jacob O'Neill:cringy but it was an act of love. Let me like I don't know if he's gonna like this but I'm fucking doing it anyway, you know, you could have easily gone and got me a t shirt from Vans t shirt or connotation I would have loved it. I would have loved that. But this this this just has such a just has it's just infused with something a little more
Meg O'Neill:do you want to speak about loving on our men right now? Are we feeling complete?
Jacob O'Neill:I'm feeling complete. To be honest. I think this is like a more of an episode around like the acts of significance I think for For men it can be it can be slightly different in regards to receiving and for me like significant things can be the I feel it's a different approach for men. Yeah,
Meg O'Neill:I think I think just the one thing I want to add to this is that you know, I know many women hold that desire for more romance so to be swept off their feet and for the woman desiring that first expressed that into the space. We spoke about that earlier on in this episode. Secondly can wear i You don't want to get this good luck. Like, are you being a nourishing space for your man? Can you deepen into nourishing your man? And not again, like we said earlier, not from the space of like, if I nourish Him, He will then sweep me off my feet. But just knowing this like, just like it's not anytime in a relationship where we're just focusing on getting something from a partnership. We're not actually partaking in Union like Union is the giving and receiving so yes, focus on Oh, I would love more of this but also then take the posture of what what more can I offer my partner? How can I nourish his nervous system or how can I make sure he's feeling really valued? And I think that's something that I I'm really specific with. I think this is something I nail in our relationship that any big moment you have in your work or in your life. I celebrate that I buy you something or I write you a big card or I get you something like a pin or like something to just like anchor anchor that moment meant for you. So it might be your retreat, like you had the retreat, the big retreat you did recently with, you know, down in Sydney. And I just knew that was big for you. So I wrote you a card. And yeah, and I think just like that, for me, what's really important in those moments is I want you to know how much I see what you're doing in the world and how much I respect and value the work you're doing, and, and all your being in the world. So I think for me, that's the equivalent of its might not be as showy for a man and a man might not want to feel it probably doesn't want to feel swept off his feet. But he wants to feel valued and seen for all the hard work or the value or the, the, yeah, the value he's putting in, I
Jacob O'Neill:would say that he doesn't want to feel special, he doesn't want to feel like the only man in the room, he just wants to feel appreciated. appreciated. Yeah. And a man feels appreciated when he receives an acknowledgement of the value that he's giving to the world, whether that's in his work, whether that's in his relationship, whether that's doing some kind of personal challenge that or achieving a personal goal as well. And these are all things that yeah, for me, like I would say, a woman wants to feel surprised, swept off her feet completely enamored and lost in the beauty of I am, I am the center of this universe. Where for a man so he you want to he wants to feel appreciated for being in service to the universe. Oh, yeah, I love that. And that for me, like, I feel most nourished when you acknowledge me for the man that I am not only right now, but the man that I'm constantly leaning into becoming, and that and that's not to say that I don't like getting presents on my birthday. And I'm learning to let love in without having done something already. But for me, I, you know, my, my value is how I, how I determine, you know, my, my sense of self outside of knowing that I'm worthy, but my my value to that, that I give to the world is what I want to be known for what I want to be appreciated for. And I love being Jacob just Jacob on his own. But I, for me, that's what that's what feeds me, and then allows me to feel more alive in giving more to not only you, but to whatever it is that I'm engaging with.
Meg O'Neill:Yes, so just kiss the mic. Yeah. So yeah, let's not forget to nourish our men. So that can be with it's trying to think of some examples. Yeah, like, I love writing new cards. That pen I bought quite a few pens over the years. I got a pen and gray for you recently, when you had a, you know, made a big business move. Yeah, just like we Yeah, I just want to bring that in. Because I think really, you know, honoring and nourishing our men also in a way that makes them feel significant but valued and appreciated. Totally
Jacob O'Neill:like booking. you've booked me in for massages before ya know that I'm exhausted. No, I'm not willing to, like do that for myself. It's like you're, you're aware of what I need. You're aware of what would would make me feel nourished. I mean, that's such a beautiful, beautiful gift. If a woman can attune to that. But I want to do this for you. And you've done that many times in many different ways. But it's, it's subtle, yet profound. Most of the time. It's not a big showy thing. It's like subtle yet profound. Yeah. As I say, So, guys, Valentine's Day is coming up. Yeah, he's just gonna say that. Sounds like yeah, this is a perfect opportunity. Like, do something crazy. Do something a little bit risky. Yeah, do something
Meg O'Neill:risky. And tell us about it. message us and tell us about it. And if you're looking for some inspo for Valentine's Day, we've got a whole lot of links below. To Yeah, we've got a whole lot of resources and courses that you can dive into that a perfect Valentine's Day gifts, I would highly recommend the desire date. If you haven't done the design, to the design, only $27 this could actually be something perfect to actually do on Valentine's Day. Yes, if you want to do something significant together and really intimate and powerful together. That's also super fucking affordable. If you don't want to go out and spend hundreds of dollars at dinner. This is $27 and you can do it in the comfort of your own home. Exactly. Really sexy, beautiful, deep, intimate date night experience. So the link is below in the shownotes or in our LinkedIn bio. Yep. We also have ignite your intimacy alpha we couples course. So that's a self paced course that you can go and buy it's $444 There's also a payment plan available. So you could surprise your partner especially you know, if you're a man and you know your partner loves this podcast, and you haven't done that course together like but you know that she really values this work on fucking surprise her with that cause let me ask or if you just want to say one more thing. or if you're on the Gold Coast or can get to the Gold Coast on the second or the third of March, surprise your partner with a motherfucking ticket to either the live podcast event or our intimacy immersion on the Sunday, or both. The intimacy immersion is a full day couples experience, it's going to be next fucking level. So this is like the perfect Valentine's Day gift, the perfect Valentine's Day gift. Link is in our link is below as well or in our buyers.
Jacob O'Neill:And the great question to ask yourself, men is what would this mean to her? Like, what would this mean? What? What would this mean? Like? What would it mean for you to invest in one of these courses and, like lean into, hey, I want to deepen our relationship. I want to deepen our intimacy. I want to do this with you. What would it feel like? What would it feel like for her to receive that and know that you're prioritizing the relationship? Like I know you've got work, I know you've got your mission, and you've got your vision and your purpose and the gym and all the other, you know, in your meditation and your eyes, I know you got all the other things that you're doing, and I fucking celebrate. Don't ever fucking stop doing you. But what would it feel like for her to know that you've allocated some resources, some of your money, you've allocated some of your time and you're going to show up and be present with your energy for for the desire date for an evening with her or for this short course ignite your intimacy, or if you're going to come and do the in person thing oh my gosh, me. Surprise
Meg O'Neill:her book a weekend away to the Gold Coast. Don't tell her you're coming to the end. When you're flying up or flying across or wherever you're wherever you're from go. We're going to the Gold Coast. We're spending a whole weekend devoted to our relationship. Oh,
Jacob O'Neill:yes. Flying in economy, in executive economy, all the extra legroom.
Meg O'Neill:I'm so excited for that week is gonna be so much better. You really, really fun really, really fun.
Jacob O'Neill:Yep. But um, yeah, go boldly and never fear the spills. It's like love is a risk. And that's what makes it fun and awesome. Love is Love is risky, it's vulnerable exposing and without it, we'd just be sitting on the couch watching Netflix and doing the same shit every fucking day. So please go and give your love boldly to those that you care about. And just see how much more is available for you for for your partner and for your relationship. Oh,
Meg O'Neill:we love you. Happy Valentine's Day. See you next week.
Jacob O'Neill:Big Love. Yo yo, yo, thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of Sex love and everything in between. Now if you'd like to stay connected with Megan i You can head on over to Instagram and follow me at the Jacob O'Neill and where can people find you lover
Meg O'Neill:at the dot Meg dot o
Jacob O'Neill:amazing and yeah, guys, check out the show notes for all other information in regards to what we've got coming up. And yeah, we're super super grateful that you guys for taking the time to listen in to this podcast. If you do have any topics or any questions, like I said, hit us up on Instagram and we'll see what we can do. Apart from that have a beautiful, beautiful rest of your day. Thanks for being here. Big Big Love.